From the Stall to the Closet (UPDATED)

Today's the day that Idaho's sweetheart, the swingin' Senator, Larry Craig, "intended to resign," according to his big announcement of 1 September. Except he decided to cop out of his guilty plea & fight the power. So it doesn't look as if he'll be leaving soon. It's far from impossible that he'll be found not guiltyget off, though Just Another Blog (From L. A.)™ would like to see him do some time. (Bet he wouldn't mind either).

Enough cheap shots in Sen. Larry's direction, there are other targets out there, as Pensito Review reveals. Here are four of them.
We don't give a shit what these clowns do in private, it's really none of our effin' beeswax, but living a lie is just not good for the non-existent soul, & in the case of an elected closet case, it may not be too good for the people they're supposed to be representing. Or in some cases, it may be fatal. We'll merely give you the headline for the first part of PR's report:

Rep. Patrick McHenry’s Connection to Gay Murderer Confirmed

It involves an "escort service," & seems to go farther than anything Barney Frank's "roomie" did on the 'phones in the basement. Mainstream media coverage? Not much, after the first reports attributed it to a "lover's quarrel."

Seems like Rep. Drier is already peeping coyly around the door, so we won't bother w/ him. Besides we can't wait to get to Sen. Graham. Look at his picture up there again.

South Carolina Republicans Would Be Unhappy to Learn that Sen. Lindsey Graham Is Gay
If it were to come out that McCain’s Mini-Me, Sen. Graham, is gay, his chances of being reelected in South Carolina next year would drop to zero:
Lindsey Graham (R-SC), an unmarried/never married 52 year old with a funny, forced way of walking, has been far more fastidious with his homosexuality [than former Rep. Mark Foley was]. Again, “everyone” knows– except the voters in conservative South Carolina. Not that it doesn’t come up from time to time; people talk. In fact, the head of the Democratic Party in South Carolina said something when the effeminate Lindsey decided to run for Thurmond’s senate seat. “He’s a little too light in the loafers” to succeed Strom Thurmond. Graham got into a really queenie tizzy fit and loudly threatened to sue– although he didn’t. (They never do.)

Other famous never-married GOP figures in their 50s include White House Chief of Staff Josh Bolten and Sec. of State Condoleeza Rice.

Disclaimer: Just Another Blog (From L. A.)™ is in its 50s, has never married or had children (to the best of its knowledge) & lives in West Hollywood. However, it is not a closeted Republican (or closeted anything else, not that there's anything wrong w/ that) and none of these folks may be either. Though we heard some stuff about Sec'y. Rice a couple of weeks ago.

Sen. Mitch has something to hide too, but it may be cowardice. (Is he chinless or is it just that huge jowl or wattle or whatever you call it?) When his Army career was cut short, it was the height of the Vietnam War, & he certainly wouldn't have been the first or last to stay out of that mess by grabbing something.

“Republican Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell’s quick expulsion from the Army — for fondling a private’s privates — is finally being discussed in Kentucky.” He notes that McConnell, discharged after just 10 days in the Army in 1967, “has consistently prevented anyone from seeing his military discharge papers” but a Freedom of Information suit may bring them to light. (After the revelation of Craig’s arrest and confession, McConnell cosigned a statement with other top Republican legislators stating, “This is a serious matter” and indicating he is examining “other aspects of the case to determine if additional action is required.”)

We'll let Jon Ponder of Pensito Review wrap this up on a cheerful note:

As we noted last week, Republicans painted themselves into this gay corner when they formed their star-crossed coalition with Christian nationalists in 1979. It was never a good fit. Country club Republicans don’t generally care about discussing family values, and going to church is not the central focus of their lives — not hardly.
The GOP could find itself right back where it was after Watergate. Bush and his toadying to the Christian right has driven away the right-leaning independents. Without the support of the poor, dumbass so-called Christians, there aren’t enough country clubbers and anti-taxers out there to win a national election. Status quo circa 1977.
If the secret lives of any of these men are revealed as the election cycle ratchets up, the Christianists could well seek solace in a third party next year, leaving the GOP’s Washington elite literally without a base to stand on.

UPDATE (30 September 2007 @ 1400): The Washington Post details how Republicans are trying to embarrass Sen. Craig into getting out of town, by holding an open ethics hearing:

The committee also could look for "a pattern of conduct" -- which means combing court records in other locales to discover whether Craig had prior arrests that haven't come to light.