Same Shit, Different Year

The Google Test

In what his aides are calling "a major speech" later today, Tim Pawlenty will pledge to dramatically cut taxes and eliminate certain parts of government if elected president.

Here's his guide: "We can start by applying what I call 'The Google Test.' If you can find a good or service on the Internet, then the federal government probably doesn't need to be doing it."

It's hardly a new idea, however. Former Indianapolis Mayor Stephen Goldsmith (R) called the same principle a "yellow pages test" more than 15 years ago in the pre-Google era.

They're Good W/ Money, Too

Not Culture Wars, War Wars

Hope this receives a bit more attention than it had as of 1000PDT today:

There are pols who aren't fighting this. On Saturday, former Ohio Secretary of State Ken Blackwell spent a little time away from the podium to meet activists and talk to reporters. He runs Reed's affiliate in Ohio; he's thinking about running for U.S. Senate. He was the only Republican in that position who said what the social conservatives believe.

"Clean water is important to us," said Blackwell. "Decent housing is important to us. But they're not rights. And we have to begin to say that what's important is that we in a rational way are able to reform these programs in a way to save them. And, yes, if it means that somewhere down the line individuals have to make sacrifices, because the rationalization of the system means we save it, but we are also doing it in a more efficient way. … I don't think too many Americans will object to that. At the end of the day we're going to get back to making sure we're in a position to finance the wars in which we engage. Does that mean we can do that without sacrificing? No. We have to make sacrifices. But what's more important? Our freedom and security or the gluttony of the federal government?"

That's right, we are to "sacrifice" in order that "the wars in which we engage" may be financed. Wars that protect our freedom & security, but won't allow for clean water, decent housing or anything else of real worth.

In order to protect the nation, we must destroy it. (Or make Ken Blackwell drink some less-than-clean water. Which would you prefer?)

(Also at Whiskey Fire.)

Weiner Wrap

Where is the sex in this "sex" scandal?

Where is the Republican jobs plan?

Where is the outcry to impeach Clarence Thomas for not reporting income for yrs. & not recusing himself from cases in which his crazy message-leaving wife has been active?

Where are the troops that should be marching home right now?

Where are the prosecutions of Bush Admin. war criminals & Bush Admin. financial criminals?

Where are David Vitter's diapers? Does his wife put them in the hamper for him now?

Where is the real outrage?

WHERE ARE THE SECOND AMENDMENT REMEDIES?

Not Bitter At All

TIME announces "The Best Blogs of 2011." One might assume that TIME understands the concept that 2011 is not even half done (Because it's, like, time.) but that assumption would be incorrect.

And is MLB Trade Rumors really necessary to the nation's discourse?

Admittedly more necessary than anything TIME has ever printed.

Plea For Votes

We haven't shit in our diapers since we stopped wearing them before we developed memory, nor have we ever taken a picture of our wiener (or anything else on our body below our chin).

Please elect us to something; our firm control & tight asssphincter (the ass itself is pretty flabby) demonstrates how eminently qualified we are!

Cool Jazz For Miserable Monday

Ahead Of Their Time

We've a vague recollection of hearing of Horseshit, The Offensive Review. (Or not, who can fucking tell after 50+ yrs. of cultural observation?) We may have confused it w/ Fuck You, A Magazine of the Arts, also mentioned in the review of Horseshit we found at Vice.

Just go look, we don't feel like excerpting.

Farm Report

Any of you clod-hopping hicks in fly-over (And as fast as one can!) country have any ideas about this, which appeared atop our Gmail?

What the hell happens to the "damaged" grain? No damn wonder people are sick all over.

Drought Up-Date

Imagine awakening at 1315 of a Sunday & discovering that there is no water flowing into the bunker!

There was enough water in the kettle for (only) one cuppa kaw-fee.

What if we'd wanted to take a shower? (Not bloody likely, as we took one just Friday, but it could happen.) What if we needed another cuppa? (Which we do.)

Nobody knows the trouble yada ...

P.S.: ++bloody hell, we really were planning to do laundry today.

Neo-Feudalism Up-Date

Per the bleeding heart guy at The NYT, Somalia is no longer the low-tax libertarian paradise; it's now our allies or whatever they are in Pakistan that the Republican Party, libertarian douche-sacks & Tea Bagging losers would most like to emulate.

I’ve always made fun of these countries, but now I see echoes of that pattern of privatization of public services in America. Police budgets are being cut, but the wealthy take refuge in gated communities with private security guards. Their children are spared the impact of budget cuts at public schools and state universities because they attend private institutions.

Mass transit is underfinanced; after all, Mercedes-Benzes and private jets are much more practical, no? And maybe the most striking push for reversal of historical trends is the Republican plan to dismantle Medicare as a universal health care program for the elderly.

There’s even an echo of the electrical generator problem. More and more affluent homes in the suburbs are buying electrical generators to use when the power fails.

We wish the bleeding heart had provided a link for richies in the suburbs leaving the grid.

And we hope that the shit hits the fan soon enough that we'll still be in adequate shape to give at least a few of the parasites their just desserts.

No Point In ...

being a slob if you don't horrifydisgust others.

On The Other Hand ...

This will cleanse (not really the exact word, but ...) your palate & reduce any desires motivated by the previous item. From laist.

Here to make your Saturday more absurd is a video lunch by the legendary Los Angeles public access personality, Francine Dancer. Fair warning to the modest or underage, she shows a lot of tush during these exuberant dance sequences. Despite her clear display of dexterity Ms. Dancer was often seen wheelchair-ing around Hollywood when not in the studio making variety show history.

We dunno from "legendary," but we've seen her wandering the streets (& riding the buses, which was irksome in that the delay to get a wheelchair w/ rider on board is completely pointless in her case) in her wheelchair, most recently in Santa Monica, as well as in Hollywood, & found ourself on the receiving end of her conversation once or twice in the last 20-odd yrs.

P.S.: Don't think you need to watch any or much of it. We'd actually advise against it.

Perfectly Safe For Work

Because there is nothing shameful about humanoid breasts.Is Franco spinning in his grave?

As Promised

Finally:You bet your sweet ass we must quibble: The landing didn't look too soft, although we'll presume that an actual humanoid might be able to exercise some control over it.

And the "Martin Jetpack" logo is a bit on the fascist side, wouldn't you say?

Original research performed by the House of Anti-McGravitas.

James Arness, Last (Maybe) Of His Kind

Last or so of the kind of WWII vets who took their GI Bill money & attended the Pasadena Playhouse to study acting or meet girls, that is. Memory fades, & it's probably too big a concept to search easily, but several future show biz names (if not want-to-be actors) decided to take courses at the Playhouse to meet actresses. ('Cause we all know what actresses are like.)

Not that Mr. Arness himself went there to meet dames, mind you.

After an honorable discharge from the Army, Mr. Arness used the GI Bill to join the acting program where he was discovered by an agent.

Ah, an example:

INSIDE LA STAGE HISTORY…When US Marine Sgt. Hugh O’Brian was discharged onto the streets of LA after WWII, he decided he liked having danced with starlets at the wartime Hollywood Canteen so much, he wanted to be around them fulltime. Wanting to take advantage of his GI Bill to study acting, he discovered there were only two places he could go to get a degree: the Pasadena Playhouse and Los Angeles City College.* “Hell, City College was a lot cheaper so that’s where I went,” recalled O’Brian.

*Known to local cognoscenti as "The University of Vermont."

LACC was founded in 1929 on Vermont Ave. on the site that was formerly the campus of UCLA.

Sony All Baloney

Here's a good one: Big Show Bidnis, helpless pitiful giant that can't help itself w/o interference from the nanny state:

The news came the same day that Sony brought the Sony PlayStation store back online after a separate massive hack, and appeared on Capitol Hill to say there was no "clear evidence" that hackers accessed credit card information on its PlayStation Network. The company, however, said it and other tech companies are vulnerable to future attacks absent any action from Congress.

No computing expert we, but wouldn't this sort of activity be less harmful if companies like Sony encrypted the apparently-quite-easy-to-obtain info of its customers?

Just what action can Congress take, besides mumbling something about the Internet being a series of tubes through which trucks are driven?

Dep't. Of Amplification

"Natural" light.

"Flash" light.

For Weird Dave, guy under the bldgs., per the Steely Dan cover.

Daily Obligatory Nothing

Here are buildings,

as we've nothing worth typing about anything.

Ministry Of Truth

There being no discernible future, wallow in the past w/ the Academy™®©'s web pp. on WWII & get hep to how Hollywood won the war.

Original title: Saludos Maricónes

Junior Anti-Sex & Liberals League

No sex please, Ben has issues.

Right Again

We've always known that no matter what hippies whine, unprocessed food is no good & will kill.

Proof positive. We will not be eating anything not enclosed in a can or frozen pkg. for the foreseeable future.

Indeed, we removed the "lettuce" from the Ralphs Monster Sandwich of which we just had a half.

Found A Picture

Per suggestion in comments below.

Thursday Or Something ...

E-Mail

Rec'd.:

Hi

I wanted to give you and the readers of Just Another Blog From L.A. some exciting info about a casual gaming and digital commerce portal launching today on HSN.com. HSN has created a gaming platform that combines eCommerce, casual games and social features.... all in one screen. The games are FREE to play -- and you can win prizes!  I've put together this micro-site with all sorts of images, info, and videos. Please feel free to share the news with your readers and use any of the assets on this site:

http://hsn-arcade.com

If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me. If you can post or tweet about this exciting initiative, please send me the link so I can share it with the team.

Thanks so much,

Chris

--
Chris Dunn
HSN Arcade

And answered:

Do any of you morons w/ advertising scams ever read the weblogs you try to place your crap on?

We despise commerce, capitalism & gambling (What a colossal rip-off!) at Just Another Blog (From L.A.) & people like you who whore yourselves for the capitalist parasites who steal your admittedly worthless work are beneath contempt.

By the way, do the people at the real Home Shopping Network know you're using their corporate identity?

Hoping that you & everyone like you dies in a fire, & soon,
M. Bouffant

"Rep." Weiner?

Time for a betting pool: When will someone whack a bit of long term attention span into Mr. Breitbart's head? If you're going to bet on who might do it, put us at the top. (Hey, just a bus ride to Breitbart's wife's house.)

Listen to the smear at work: "Young girls, relationships ... yada ... even younger ..."See also. Coincidence? Hah!

Original offense not available on CNN:However (0145PDT 1 June 2011):