Friday, October 16, 2009

Double Dose Of The Bottom Ten (Get Those Bets In!)

COLLEGE FOOTBALL

The Bottom Ten

New Mexico holds the top spot, but Rice and Miami (Ohio) are lurking.

By Steve Harvey
October 15, 2009
Tensions will be high among Bottom Ten teams this weekend, knowing that the first BCS standings will come out afterward. In this case, BCS stands for "Bowl Chump Series."

The No. 1 Lost Lobos of New Mexico are one of the main contenders for a place in the BT's projected reality show. One snag: NBC already stole the title "The Biggest Loser."

Elsewhere, officials at No. 6 Florida State denied rumors that Coach Bobby Bowden would step down and be replaced by Penn State's Joe Paterno.

Also, fans of the erratic No. 11 Cal Bears could be excused for wondering which Cal team will show up against UCLA on Saturday -- the Cal team that lost to Oregon, 42-3, a few weeks ago, or the Cal team that defeated Alabama, 13-0, in the 1938 Rose Bowl. Only time will tell.
Wreck, Record
Last Loss
Next Loss
1. New Mexico (0-6)
13-37, Wyoming
Nevada Las Vegas
2. Rice (0-6)
14-63, Navy
East Carolina
3. Miami (Ohio) (0-6)
6-16, Northwestern
Ohio (Ohio)
4. Purdon't (1-5)
20-35, Minnehaha
Ohio State
5. Ball State (0-6)
19-24, Temple
Bowling Green
6. Florida State (2-4)
44-49, Georgia Tech
North Carolina
7. Washington State (1-5)
14-27, Arizona State
Cal
8. Colorado (1-4)
14-38, Texas
Kansas
9. Syracuse (2-4)
13-34, West Virginia
Akron
10. San Jose State (1-4)
25-29, Idaho
Fresno State
11. Cal (0-2) (in conference); 12. Utah State (1-4); 13. Florida International (1-4); 14. Vanderbilt (2-4); 15. Nevada (Las Vegas) (2-4); 16. Bowling Green (2-4); 17. Hawaii (2-3); 18. Out to lunch; 19. Maryland (2-4); 20. Texas at El Erratic Paso (2-4).
Rout of the week: Ohio State (5-1) over Purdon't (1-5).
Crummy game of the week: Bowling Green (2-4) vs. Ball State (0-6).
Copyright ©2009, The Los Angeles Times


NFL BOTTOM 10

Oakland Raiders score a rare touchdown

They take over No. 1 spot in weekly ranking of failing teams, but at least they provide some amusing moments.

By Steve Harvey
October 15, 2009
Sure, CBS analyst Boomer Esiason said the Raiders are the worst team in football the other day.

But they're making some progress. Against the Giants on Sunday, they even scored their first touchdown in 130 plays (their only touchdown of the game).

The Raiders are also among the best in the NFL when it comes to generating laughs. On one kickoff return Sunday, they were flagged for using a wedge formation. But no penalty was assessed because the Raiders returner had misjudged the kick and had been forced to chase it into the end zone, where he downed it for a touchback.

Speaking of offensive performances -- take that anyway you want -- the machine-like St. Louis Lambs tallied another 10 points, raising their average to 6.8 per game.

Remember those teams that fired their offensive coordinators in training camp (Buffalo, Kansas City and Grampa Bay)? Well they're a combined 1-14. And to those three, the Bottom Ten says, "Thank you."
Wreck (Record); Last Loss; Next Loss
1. Oakland (1-4); 7-44, N.J. Giants; Philadelphia
2. St. Louis (0-5); 10-38, Minnehaha; Jacksonville
3. St. Louis (0-3); Swept by Dodgers; Season Over
4. Grampa Bay (0-5); 14-33, Philadelphia; Carolina
5. Kansas City (0-5); 20-26, Dallas; Washington
6. Tennessee* (0-5); 7. Buffalo (1-4); 8. Jacksonville (2-3); 9. Carolina (1-3); 10. Washington (2-3).
*Best 0-5 team in football, though.
Rout of the week: Philadelphia (3-1) over Oakland (1-4).
Crummy game of the week: Carolina (1-3) vs. Grampa Bay (0-5).
Quotebook: CBS' Dan Marino, as he viewed clips from Cleveland's 6-3 victory over Buffalo: "Is this the NFL, guys?"
Easiest schedule of all time? The No. 10 Redskins are only 2-3 even though they have yet to take the field against a team with any victories, points out ExtremeSkins.com. They opened against the Giants (who were 0-0, naturally) and next played the Rams (then 0-1), the Lions (then 0-2), the Bucs (then 0-3), and the Panthers (then 0-3). Next they play Kansas City (0-5).
Special citation: Dallas' defense was cited for being offside four times on one drive against Kansas City.
Copyright ©2009, The Los Angeles Times

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