Saturday, June 16, 2007

Dep't. of Irony



Military gear is hap-nin' 'cuz it's cheap, surplus/recycled, & always ironic when sported by a wanna-be draft dodger. (Just Another Blog, for example.)

Therefore, this may be an interesting item.

Dem Ah Loot, Dem Ah Shoot, Dem Ah Wail...

...and they breed too!
Two women have been arrested trying to cross from Gaza into Israel. They are both mothers of (many) children, and one was pregnant with her ninth.
Marty P. of TNR gets nervous & pessimistic. (Looking through the top of the comments, it appears the two mothers at least wanted to be suicide bombers, though there's no further info or linkage, & Peretz couldn't be persuaded to link or otherwise document his litany of troubles.) I somehow got on TNR's sucker list, every weekday one of my in-boxes has a list of their on line stuff, half of which is only available to "subscribers," & a lot of which is of no interest. But you find a nugget of deliciousness once in a while.And here's another one I bet some of the audience will be interested in. At least the 53ish yr. old demographic. From the comments:
"Hajdu's report makes Zorn sound a lot older than 53. A cranky old man, wedded to his 'art' like a man in a crappy marriage."
Look quickly, the secret backdoor entry may not work forever. (It's "subscription only.")

M. C. Hammer of Thor

@TNR (Turkey Necked Retirees?) something is rising from the grave. And it's not wearing its parachute pants any more. Gives ups to G. W., believes children are the future, wants the brothers home! Hammer on comeback trail? Oaktown! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSNcG7jt6Wo

And a commenter is inspired to this:

Any chance Iraq can become a game show? posted by williamyard on 2007-06-11 14:10:00

Contestants can submit podcasts, i.e., "What I Would Do With Iraq On My Summer Vacation." Audience members would vote with those little Bluetooth voting gizmos that audience members vote with. The host is Michael "Let's Get Ready to Rumble!" Buffer. We drape Tanya Roberts in a glittery red-sequined burqa and have her stand beside the screen and wave at each entrant. When the first-place winner is announced she rips off the burqa and stands there grinning in an American flag bikini. The first-place winner receives a new (stripped-down) Chevrolet Impala! Made (somewhat) in the USA! The second-place winner receives a six-month supply of Fancy Feast Extruded Parts In Gravy and a set of Lee Press-On Nails. The third-place winner receives a one-way ticket to Baghdad.

"Stop Hammer!! Don't Kill 'em!!"

Self Awareness Through Proofreading

Just Another Blog was indulging itself a bit, reading the archives (& fixing a typo here & there) when it noticed that if it had been in a bar or any other public space & started speaking aloud some of the charming bits it's been typing here, it would be in some trouble before it realized what it was saying. What a fine rage management tool this cyberweb is. (S'pose I'se been miiiighty lucky nobody sens'tive done come by the ol' homestead.) And the donkey you rode in on.

Eisenhouser

"Did everyone become Jehovah Witness when we voted for Dwight Eisenhouser [sic]? Or how about when Taft was elected? Did we reject Jesus as Lord because it he was a Unitarian?"

Questions, etc....Another one from two wks. in the in-basket
And some answers, but no comments from Just Another Blog this time. This stuff is beyond mockery. And it's bed time.



Charles Martel writes:
Sunday, June,
03, 2007 5:36 AM
the difference couldn't be simpler
The difference between Judaism and Catholicism on the one hand and Mormonism and Mohammedanism on the other is that the latter were made up, invented out of whole cloth to
suit the needs and lustful desires of their blasphemous and evil founders, while the former were not.Now, why don't you go and waste the rest of your day trying to persuade me away from that.For the record -- and so that you won't have to speculate -- I am a Lutheran, though don't get me started on the ELCA.By the way, *General* Eisenhower made a rather poor Jehovah's Witness, don't you think? And he eventually converted to Presbyterianism. As for Taft's Unitarianism: at least the Unitarians do not depend on works of fiction to arrive at their theology. (This is the cue for the anti-Christians among you to denounce the Bible as fiction and me as a hypocrite. That will also be as persuasive as the president's case for immigration "reform". Have at it.)I have not urged the suppression of the Mormons -- I think we're way past that, no? -- but I repeat that I will not cast a ballot for one seeking national office.



AudiR10 writes:
Sunday, June, 03, 2007 6:29 AM
ghh and others
The gods and goddesses the LDS church worships in concert with the One True God that Christians worship are -- THEMSELVES! Mormons believe that if they get married in the temple and obey all the rules, they will BECOME gods and goddesses, sit on the exalted councel of the Gods and Goddesses on Planet Kolob, and rule the universe together with God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit, who are three separate gods and exactly like the "translated" human
beings who are promoted to god and goddesshood to in their turn create planets and populate and rule them.I have attended a lot of Christian church denominations in my day, and I also attended the mormon church for three years as a member, and the LDS church is the only church I have ever attended that
believes in a pantheistic godhead. There are your "other gods" guys. You Mormons are setting up human beings including (you hope) yourselves as gods and goddesses. That is both heresey and blasphemy according to every Christian denomination except maybe Unitarians and the United Church here in Canada which only requires that you profess at least 75% of the Creed in order to belong.I profess the Jesus of the Creeds and not the Jesus who is some guy from another planet who is chairman of the God Committee. But I part ways with the Mormons way before that -- at "We acknowledge ONE BAPTISM for the remission of sins". A church that does not recogize my Christian baptism is not a Christian church. The End.And I will not vote for Mitt Romney because I believe that if you are a faithful adherent to your religion it will colour everything else you do -- including your attitude toward the unmarried, which the LDS church hold as not worthy of the Celestial Kingdom, only worthy of being servants to the gods and goddesses in the corner office.

Needles
writes:
Sunday, June, 03, 2007 8:09 AM
TAMA
Sir you must be in denial or ignorant of Christianity and Mormonism. The fact is what always defines false religions from Christianity (and that would include some denominations that are "mainstream" is they worship a god or gods of their imagination, not the God of the Bible.As far as Mormonism, it is so blatantly
heretical that it is even looked down upon by other less heretical "christian denominations".1. Plurality of gods - LDS rejects the Trinity, and the three persons of the Godhead are viewed as separate and distinct. They believe God the Father has a physical body, and the Holy Spirit is a personage of Spirit. Joseph Smith stated, " God himself was once as we are now, and is an exalted man, and sits enthroned in yonder heavens!...He was once a man like us."2. They believe
the the difference of other men and Christ is one of degree - not of kind. The scriptural teaching on the virgin birth is rejected. Brigham Young stated that "Jesus Christ was not begotten by the Holy Ghost" Christ's birth was the result of a physical union between God the Father and Mary.


WTH writes:
Sunday, June, 03,
2007 8:44 AM
Mormons are not Christians
I have to say that I really don't care if a Mormon wants to believe in the "Book of Mormon". A person's private faith is his affair alone.However, Mormonism is clearly a con job writ large, a false religion created by an inveterate con man, and a clear construct of man all for the purpose of some level of personal power. In the end it is not so much a religion as a cult.So, here is the problem I have with having a President who is a practicing Mormon: if such a man is foolish enough to be taken in by a cult that can so easily be proven to be based on the wild-eyed ranting of a con man, if this man is so naive as to be taken in by this false religion.... what will he be so foolish as to be taken in by as he holds the reins of power of my country? Such a man has proven that his judgment cannot be trusted by being a Mormon in the first place. How can we trust him to be our
president?

Mr. Pastore and all those agreeing with him, I hope the
justifications you have of being a "Christian" first are fulfilled when Hillary names the next 3 Supreme Court judges. I'm sure your "Christian" beliefs will be satisfied when your children are taught that homosexuality is normal and that gay marriage is something to be embraced. As God disappears from our society and moral laxity prevails, I'm sure your "Christian" ideals will prove to be upheld.



buckleyfollower writes:
Sunday, June,
03, 2007 10:48 AM
The intellectual choice
I do not believe it is bigotry to have a problem with Mr. Romney's religon. There is a wealth of research on the violent and illogical history of Mormonism, starting with Under the Banner of Heaven. Smith was a con man, that is simply a fact. He was proscuted by the goverment of New York for claming he could find gold with a magical rock (the same rock that he used to translate the Book Of Mormon). I could write on all the problems with Mormonism, but the aforementioned book does that nicely. If you want all the facts about Mormonism, you can read that book. By proceeding from the assumption that there is something inherently illogical and false about Mormonism, I have to wonder if it is a wise move to elect a President who was
deceived by this "religon." It is the intellectual choice of following a religon whose holy book describes a battle between a holy tribe (whites) and an unholy tribne (blacks) and is also riddled with anachromisms and inconsistencies that bothers me. Smith was charismatic, and it is understandable that people during
his time (in the "burned over" district) fell for his lies and manipulations (my favorite of which is the orgin of polygamy-when he told his wife that God commanded him to sleep around). But anyone removed from his presence and that
time should have the good sense to critcally examine the beliefs of the Mormon religon and see through them. Now, I will, like Pastore, vote for Mr. Romney becuase of his poltical postions, but I resent those who claim it is bigotry to judge Mr. Romney on his religous choice. Just as one would examine the logic of
his poltical postions, so to is it fair to examine the logic of his religous ones.



I find it ironic that I continually defend Mormons in this forum even though I'm not one and know squat about their dogma, despite having lived in Utah for 20 plus years.What I do know is that my streets have no strip clubs, no porn shops, no street corner crack dealers or hookers(OK, they do exist in Salt Lake, but not my community) and if I want a beer on Sunday I have
to drive 10 miles to buy one.If that's considered a cult, maybe more of America would be better served by this cultish example.


voiceofreason writes:
Sunday, June,
03, 2007 1:50 PM
just so I'm clear....
buckleyfollower writes:I have to wonder if it is a wise move to elect a President who was deceived by this "religon." Just so I'm clear, its bizarre to believe in gold plates, magic stones, new visions etc., but normal to believe in a three part god, who had a son, that's sort of really part of god but not quite. And because he died, I can be free of "sin" even though nothing's been heard from him for 2000 years?



utahnotmormon writes:
Sunday, June,
03, 2007 1:54 PM
Just to be even clearer
>Just so I'm clear, its bizarre to believe in gold plates, magic stones, new visions etc., but normal to believe in a three part god, who had a son, that's sort of really part of god but not quite. And because he died, I can be free of "sin" even though nothing's been heard from him for 2000 years?


And not believing in either means you have no morals, ethics, hate Jesus, are anti-God and probably a communist.


craigers
writes:
Sunday, June, 03, 2007 2:30 PM
misses the point entirely
Wat is not talked about is why there is opposition to Mormonism, now and JFK's Catholicism then.The major issue over JFK's religion was, if the Vatican said "Jump" would JFK say how high? As the Catholic church today is more and more becoming what the nativists of the early 1800's feared, a power that has
alighned itself with Amercias Enemies (ie international socialism). What can we expect from another religionist who is attatched to another church that puts obedience to its "prophit" first? Then there is the question of intelligence. Haivng studied mormon roots, I cannto believ that anyone with an IQ over 40 can believe this nonsesne of the book of Mormon orgins. As the line goes, "say the prayer at the back of the book and if you get a "feeling", it will be proven to you", is a direct attack against reason and rationality.Can we have a president that is a MOrmon? Well we have had socialists and Billary is a Maosit running for the Presidency, both of which are religions demanding obedience to their own belief system regardles of reality and the real world. The real reason Mit cannot be voted for is he is a member of the party of the international elitists. If you want a North AMerican union and the destruction of America, vote the top 3 in. YOu'll get it.

As for Mr. Pastore, you my friend are very embarrassingly
bigoted, misinformed about the LDS faith, and perhaps in sincerity need some professional counselling, in lieu of your esteemed flawed & regularly given downtrodded remarks of ill rebuke concerning the LDS faith.



voiceofreason writes:
Sunday, June,
03, 2007 3:03 PM
and even clearer still
Thanks utahnotmormon, I don't think anyone could make my point that religion and politics don't mix more cogently or effectively than you did -- "And not believing in either means you have no morals, ethics, hate Jesus, are anti-God and probably a communist.


"Where does that leave the Jews, (my folks) are they immoral, unethical commies too?

Secondly, Jesus is not merely Lord, He is also very God.
For you to assert that Jews worship the same God as Christians is to fly in the face of all that the church has fought for since the beginning. Jews do not worship the same God as Christians, we worship Christ as very God they however do not. That is why they delivered Him up to Ceasar's man to be killled. Be
careful that in your attempt to speak politically you do not err
theologically.God Bless for the sake of Christ


sower




Gestell writes:
Sunday, June,
03, 2007 8:08 PM
Try them all for heresy!
One of the things I love about you conservatives is your wonderful practice of waging holy war on one another over religion. I now know that the 2008 presidential election is really about picking whoever is going to be the principal religious authority for the country--High-Priest-in-Chief of the United States. Last time I looked, that wasn't a constitutional office, but maybe things have changed.Christianity is clearly a religion that divides people, and all along I thought it was about salvation by God's grace, but hey, I'm not a conservative so how can I be a
Christian anyway?I suggest that the platform committee for the Republican convention next year come up with a few plankns expressing whatever the consensus is among you guys on religious doctrines. I'm really lookiing forward to the Word from the Republican synod on such topics as predestination,
monophysitism, Donatism (look 'em up) and how best to translate from koine Greek (look it up). Clearly, conservative politics is largely focused on religion. Heresy trials, anyone?


Rayfinn
writes:
Monday, June, 04, 2007 9:32 PM
will
Awesome bit of logic and funny too. We all need to look back at this and laugh and then fight together in causes that unite us. Core conservative values, no abortion, anti-pornography,
powers usurped from the states to the Federal government. One of my biggest peeves is over tax deductions. Babs Streisand can give a benefit performance and take her performance fee as a full tax deduction. I can give 10 hours of my time to the Boy Scouts and cannot even claim a minimum wage write off. We have to fix the inequities.


Akennas
writes:
Tuesday, June, 05, 2007 12:15 PM
talent scout
Your last post revealed you as the twisted, evil person you are. One cannot spill such bile toward the servants of the Lord without eternal consequences. You obviously wouldn't know the truth if Jesus Himself slapped you in the face with it. You
have just added your name to the list of un-Christian Cockroaches standing proudly at the left hand of Jesus, kicking the pricks and fighting against God.

Well, maybe that last one is worth a question: "kicking the pricks?" He's not talking about J. C. & G. is he?

Friday, June 15, 2007

Let's Have a War (Every Ten Years or So)

M1A1 TUSK Version B This has been on the bottom of the in-box since 2 June. Don't know why it sat there so long, as it is a short, simple explanation of neo-conservative ideology, as well as one of the reasons "they" hate "us" so damn much. It's from one of America's Leading Warmongers™, Michael Ledeen, who's been linked with the Niger Yellowcake Uranium Affair (cf. Wikipedia, or search: "Ledeen + forgery") & of course has been heard recently suggesting that Iran needs a whuppin' soon too. Here's the meat of the article, written by Jonah Goldberg in what is now nostalgically remembered as The Run-Up to The Glorious War.
WHY IRAQ? So how does all this, or the humble attempt at a history lesson of my last column, justify tearing down the Baghdad regime? Well, I've long been an admirer of, if not a full-fledged subscriber to, what I call the "Ledeen Doctrine." I'm not sure my friend Michael Ledeen will thank me for ascribing authorship to him and he may have only been semi-serious when he crafted it, but here is the bedrock tenet of the Ledeen Doctrine in more or less his own words: "Every ten years or so, the United States needs to pick up some small crappy little country and throw it against the wall, just to show the world we mean business." That's at least how I remember Michael phrasing it at a speech at the American Enterprise Institute about a decade ago (Ledeen is one of the most entertaining public speakers I've ever heard, by the way). *
There it is, flat-out, in black & white, neither holds barred nor punches pulled. No excuses made or offered, no search for WMDs, no oil-for-democracy deals, no "regional stabilization," just the brutal logic of the schoolyard bully, who must frighten others to quell his own fear. And that's why this is a two-front war; domestically, & wherever we smoke terrorists out. And the problem at home is not limp liberal weenies who "don't get it," are "soft on communislamiterrorism," and can't wait to stuff the womenfolk into burqas, but those like Ledeen & Goldberg who are compelled to lash out at the "crappy little countries," no matter their responsibility, and w/out taking responsibility for the proverbial blood & treasure squandered for their tantrums. Lives, & money, that should have been devoted to dealing with what actually threatens us, have been pissed away in pathetic macho posturing that has killed hundreds of thousands of human beings, greatly reduced our world standing, and reduced our safety by confirming for young Muslims that we are crusaders and they should get medieval on us. This has all been typed before, of course, by better typists than you'll read here, and Forgery Boy's quote is five years old now, but some things bear remembering & repeating.
*So "entertaining" Just Another Blog™ forgot to laugh.

Economic Determinism


This poster is from the 1930's, and promotes the Nazi monthly Neues Volk (New People}, the organ of the party's racial office. The text reads: "This genetically ill person will cost our people's community 60,000 marks over his lifetime. Citizens, that is your money. Read Neues Volk, the monthly of the racial policy office of the NSDAP."
(Shorter Nazis: Poor and sick people are stealing your money! Shorter Library of Economics and Liberty: Ditto!)
Quite the libertarian, anti-immigration, pro-deportation (& you don't have to be an illegal alien to get tossed out, every one's eligible !) literacy testing, poll taxing circle jerk going on @ The Library of Economics and Liberty. It's usually trouble when you hear "economics" & "liberty" in the same sentence. Big trouble. Are these people not aware that others not in on their unfunny little joke can read their anti-democratic, un-American postings?

Commenter J. Smith @ Sadly, No! first brought it up. I'm sure by now it's sweeping the ocean.

Do You Like Boobs-a-Lot?

If you do, you can (if you're Joy Behar, anyway) say "tits" on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, and not have it censored. Habeas Corpus nothing, this is a free country.


None of that on Johnny's Tonight Show.

To Hell w/ It!

I just give up. If I can't get a decent shot of Lillie, I'm just going to publish these shots of a dark, vaguely feline blob (See? It has triangular shapes on what may be its head, it must be a cat, unless it's a fox or something.) & not give sweet Fanny Adams about the whole mess.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Campaign Update w/ Mel Blanc

In order to publish on a daily basis, I made a quick sweep of the electron zone & found this, in the comments @ alicublog, from one Jay B:
"Ladies and gentlemen, feel the sexual heat of Fred! The Elmer Fudd lookalike voiced by Foghorn Leghorn."
I didn't say it was going to be an original, did I? Still pretty damn good, though.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Please Keep Your Legs Closed & Inside the Vehicle

AN OPEN LETTER TO BRITNEY SPEARS: Just Another Blog™ has had it with seeing your pixelated naughty parts on the telebision. If you have some sort of problem down there, involving various infections or infestations, which you, in your trailer trash way, think can be cured just by airing out your Petri dish, please be advised that medical science has made great strides in the past few decades, and perhaps a consultation with the pharmacist @ the Rite-Aid, or even with a doctor, might be of some help. The FAA is worried that the concentration of sea gulls over your Malibu mansion may soon be interfering w/ air traffic patterns in the greater Los Angeles area. Please have some consideration for the rest of humanity. Thank you. (Just Another Blog™ is so serious that it didn't even use this as an excuse to put pictures of Ms. Spears' unpixelated parts in this item, even though it has access to many such shots.)

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Fan Mail From Some Flounder?

M. Bouffant's first e-mail from a celebrity. He's so proud.

Neil Diamond
to michaeldel, mbouffant,
liukang, kslockwood
show details
1:23 am (13 hours ago)
The
Only Clinically Tested Penis N-largement Pills that works..- add 1-4 inches to
your peniis- 20% thicker- 5x more enjoyable orgasm- or your monneyy back without
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"ManXL".
Mr. Diamond (trying to look like Mr. Mojo Risin') shows the results you can expect from his fine new product.

J. E. L. L. O.

Consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds:
Members of the Baking Fig Leaf Wearers Association prepare to make with the secret handshake you'll need to get into heaven:
Victoria's Secret my ass, look at this hot shit:
More poop on how much Mormons & their "ism" suck may be found @ exmormon.org & exMormonFoundation.org. And as always, clickity-click- click on the links for some real fun. "Pay Lay Ale."

Scientology is a Fucking Lie Too


On the right, two future Assistant Managers (the taller one will get days, the shorter evenings) of the NAPA auto parts store in Bumfuck, Utah, model the short-sleeved "dress" shirt & tie look they'll be sporting in their lives to come. Only thing missing? The official NAPA pocket protector, w/ a tire pressure gage & a few cheap pens in it. How nice of the Mormons to see to it that their "missionaries" know how to dress for success.
Regular reader(s?) of Just Another Blog know there is no quarter given to religion here, & that we're especially fond of beating The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints™ soundly about its Temple Garments because it is such an obvious con job. And just as Mormon doctrine changes w/ the wind, so does Willard "Mittens" Romney change his stance on, well, just about anything political. And now he's waffling & flip-flopping on his very religion. If it's an eternal truth, why does it change so often? Is your "Holy Father" unable to keep the same thought in his cosmic mind for more than a few yrs. at a time? Is he as big a hypocrite as his flock? DO YOU FUCKING MORMON LOSERS HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR YOURSELVES, OR TRUTH, OR ANYTHING EXCEPT THE WRETCHED OLD WHITE MEN WHO RUN YOUR LIVES FOR YOU THROUGH THE COUNCIL OF TWELVE APOSTLES OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOUR RULING BODY CALLS ITSELF?
P. S. How many vicious, mean & cruel statements (all of them true, however) do we have to make about all your pathetic fairy tales, myths, and outright lies before some thin-skinned religious loser notices & makes Just Another Blog famous notorious? Or as one buzzard says to the other in the New Yorker cartoon: "Patience, hell, I'm going to kill something."
And thanks to The Daily Dish for reading the NYTimes in the first place. I've got too much to do to look for original sources.

Bob Novak is a Jerk Off

A WaPo commentator writes, in response to this column by Catholic asshole (yes, it's redundant, but I like to make my point clear) Bob "Prince of Darkness" Novak:

joe3 wrote: 21 pages of hate mail. Why does WaPo still run this Jerk Off's column? 6/11/2007 8:30:33 PM

Yes, Novak is a colossal Catholic jerk off, but does it need capitalization?

Fag Bomb

Local kids World O' Crap bring this to our attention, from the CBS O&O in Sodom-by-the-Bay: DoD looked into turning opposing forces "gay," to reduce unit cohesion. As Scott said at WO'C: "Man. I really can’t figure out why we’re losing in Iraq."

Monday, June 11, 2007

So Much for The Sopranos

Never watched it, even when I had HBO. Now that I've no HBO, but stolen cable anyway, I'll never watch it. (No DVD puechases for me, and why watch on A&E when all the "fucks" & "shits" are excised?) Good reason not to have watched? Every shitheel on the telly today seems to have an opinion on the apparently tricky & unsatisfying ending. (That's why I never watched, I knew the end would be a cop out. And I'll not be watching much that's popular w/ telebision shitheels, either. Or that makes the cover of the New Yorker. Telebision is for brain dead entertainment, not for pretentious East Coast fuckwads to pass off as "art." Art is old crap you hang on a wall somewhere. I have spoken.)

Pointless aside: This appears to be the 100th item on Just Another Blog. Blogger tells me so. I'd have to take off my shoes five times to count that high.

Please Leave Me Alone, I'm Dead

This killed me. I guess they wouldn't want to rely on the mainstream media for any information, though. Are these the people who chose the Surgeon General nominee?

Sunday, June 10, 2007

More Idle Threats

The usual gang of idiots @ the scabsite known to many as Clownhall™ make idle threats too. In response to Ol' Jowly's bloviation linked to a couple posts below, we get these:

"Dangerous" Dave writes:
Thursday, June, 07, 2007 11:34 PM
This, along with the recent camera phone video of that 17 year old Kurdish girl being kicked and stoned to death for dating a Sunni Boy, have made me think there is no hope for these folks. They need to be done like Ripley wanted to do to the aliens in the second Alien movie... pull out, nuke them from orbit. Maybe start the Middle East over from scratch. These are barbaric animals, and the only way to deal with them is to terrorize them. Or kill them.

Wonder what "Dangerous" thought we should do about all those miscegenation laws we used to have in This Great Nation of Ours™? Drop a few nukes from orbit on the Mississippi Delta where Emmett Till was murdered for whistling @ a white woman? "From orbit." Jeezis, what a complete moron. Do these fools get all their ideas from action movies & video games?
Dark_Wizard writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 4:12 AM
Don't be such a Jimmy Carter
This is what I would do if I were President Bush. Call Ahmadinejad on his cell phone (Vlad Putin has the number) and say "look to the south of Tehran at morning prayers tomorrow. The red glow on the horizon will be an oil refinery burning. If the hostages are not drinking beer in Germany on Saturday morning, then another oil refinery and one transfer terminal will be next. Oh! Just so you know, we have more cruise missiles then you have oil production facilities.
Have a nice day.

Hey, "Wiz": Try closing your quotes, and then go back to your Bungholes &
Dragqueens games.


Bev writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 5:01 AM
agenda for Iran
Does the word Caliphate mean anything? Iran's leader has made clear his intentions. Don't look for any logic within. Anything and everything will be done within Iran's power to make this happen -- don't be fooled into thinking anything less.

We'll assume "Bev" wanted to ask: "Does the word caliphate mean
anything to you?," because I know the word means something.
Oddly enough, it's not what Ahmadinejad wants, he's into the
"return of the twelfth imam," or something, which I guess is like when God, jr. comes back for the Jesusites. Nothing but foaming maniacs who can't wait to destroy the world, no matter which side of the crusade they're
on.

And from "Big Arch": If I were POTUSA I would not send cruise missiles in where NUKES would do a far better job of ending the terror of the nutcases that wear towels on their heads and hate in their hearts.

It's POTUS, not "POTUSA." These people all have reading problems, & comprehension problems, & memory problems. Shorter version: They're stupid. The dangerous kind. There's Forrest Gump stupid, where people at least realize they're stupid and deal w/ it, and there's these people stupid, where some other problem keeps them from realizing they'd all be a hell of a lot better off if they'd just shut up & leave the grown-ups alone.

Rich L.writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 7:57 AM
Fred, it is good to see you have a fine grasp of the situation. Now as to the solution, I like Charlie's idea better than Big Arch's nuclear answer for the simple reason that a nuke attack would cause serious ramifications whereas the tactical cruise
missile would cause minor ramifications. If we nuke, we would have to go all out and turn the entire country, if not ME, into glass. Not the worst outcome, but as I said, there would be ramifications even from our "allies".

These people only understand might and force, anything less is considered a weakness to be exploited.

"Not the worst outcome..." Oh. That would be...?

Chopper John writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 9:10 AM
New Advisors
Dear Pres Bush It is readily apparent to some of us out here that your current crop of advisors have failed you miserably. That is, unless the problem actually lies with you failing to follow their advice. Whichever the case may be, I strongly suggest you pay serious attention to the advice offered by posters Dark Wizard and CharlieS. You must not continue to let that little curtain climber get away with flaunting his terrorist horse manure, and the advice of the aforementioned posters seems reasonably thought out and easily accomplished by our beloved Navy.

Well done, DW and CS.

"Little curtain climber?" Huh? And a big crush on the "beloved" Navy. Or those brave, vibrant, virile sailors anyway, all pent up from months at sea...

Gunny writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 11:21 AM
Dangerous Dave rocks
I agree 100 percent with Dave. There is no way to placate or appease these barbarians. Their whole way of life is one of deception, riddles, lies and fakery. Their religion tells them it's OK to lie to and deceive their enemies. Their religious
leaders have complete control of their minds.The only way their leaders can remain in power is to constantly remind them that Israel and America are their enemies and that when they are destroyed, the world will open up all it's riches to them....

America and Israel are holding them hostages and are the reason they are so poor and miserable...not because of anything their own leaders are responsible for.You can listen to these Islo-Fascist people give their so-called reasons for this Jihad to rid the world of democracy, but it mostly rationalization for wholesale murder. In the end the only way to solve our
problem is to kill them off or at the very least frighten them into thinking that any more nonsense on their part will be their certain death, theirs and their families.

Well, the old reversal works pretty well on this one. "The only way our leaders can remain in power is to constantly remind us that Muslims are our enemies and when they are destroyed, their oil will be ours." And: "...it mostly rationalization for wholesale murder." That's them. For us, however: "...the only way to solve our problem is to kill them off..." That's not wholesale murder, is it? (And I'm sure "Gunny" wants us all to think he is/was a Gunnery Sg't. in the USMC, but I'm guessing his name is from his primary occupation, picking up trash w/ one of those sticks w/ a spike on the end, & putting said trash into a gunny sack. Ha ha.)


Georgetwin writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 12:54 PM
Bottom-Line
Once Again, we have to clean up a mess that A Liberal President was too COWARDLY to take care of! It's time to drop the gloves, call that little runt, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, and say, 'Put the Hostages on a plane to Germany Immediately or You Will be A Smoking Hole in The Sand!’

In which case said "hostages" will have been reduced to their component atoms & quarks as well, but, you know, gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet. Note also that Bush is now "A Liberal President."


tnmccoy writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 12:54 PM
Or Else?
By the way, to paraphrase a past President with a problem in North Africa: "the American Hostages or Ahmadinejad!? And if we back it up, our message would be loud and clear.

tnmccoy's message isn't too clear. It's actually incomprehensible.


SNAFU writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 3:52 PM
Appropriate response to Iran
Fred, get elected and treat Iran as the scoundrels they are. Conduct unrestricted warfare: carpet bomb Iran until its government is utterly destroyed and unable to resist. And then take their oil as reparations.

Right, that "carpet bombing " would only destroy the Iranian gov't. And if I'm not mistaken, those who cause damages would be the ones paying the "reparations," not those who were carpet bombed.


SNAFU writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 4:31 PM
Fred's strategy
His strategy is brilliant. While the professional politico-piggies are slopping each other with mud, he stays above the fray. Let them spend their money and political capital while Fred hones his campaign machine in preparation for the big contest: defeating whoever the democrats nominate.

Absolutely brilliant. One little quibble, though: Fat Boy has to get nominated himself before he can defeat the Democratic nominee.

forrest sez: Fred looks vibrant and virile, and I'm sure you would agree that he could take all the other repub and dem male candidates in one on one hand to hand combat. I would go so far as to say he could take Paul and Huckabee at the same time.

Yep, it's all about grade school macho w/ the Republicans. And Viagra, I guess. "Vibrant & virile." Ooooh. You really can't tell by the noms de web these clowns use, but there may be quite a few homophobic closet cases here.


SNAFU writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 5:29 PM
War Czar & Troop Surge
Vietnam disabused me of the nation-building notion. I don't care about trying to build a nation that will some time in the future turn on us. A better idea, IMHO, is to wage unrestricted warfare against Iraq, Afghanistan and anyone else who presents a threat into utter submission. Carpet bomb them (forward) into the Stone Age. Destroy their government and their infrastructure and then confiscate their oil as reparations. In combat, my job was to bring my men home alive and in one piece, nothing more, nothing less. And, if necessary, I prefer 10,000 Iraqi men, women and children dead in their hovels than to see even one American soldier, sailor, airman or marine so much as scratched. So I nominate me for War
Czar. It's a job that would soon be unnecessary to fill. No war, no czar.

Our friend SNAFU expands his thoughts on humanity (& oil). Nation building in 'Nam? They'll all turn on us eventually, let's just kill them all right now. "In combat, my job was to bring my men home alive and in one piece, nothing more, nothing less." You weren't supposed to accomplish any missions or achieve any objectives? Or win the effin' war, single-handedly? If your only job was to bring the boys home, were you the Captain of Cut & Run? The Sergeant of Surrender? The Lieutenant of Leaving?


Dark_Wizard writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 6:01 PM
baseballdoc
Thanks but I couldn't get elected, I don't have a single skeleton in my closet and if you don't mind the stench of decomposing bodies, your more then welcome to look.

Nobody beats the (Dark) Wiz. I think this may be an attempt at what passes for humor among the nuke 'em crowd. Does he think you do need a skeleton in your closet to be elected?


Dark_Wizard writes:
Friday, June, 08, 2007 9:21 PM
Fred Thompson
"Trophy Wife" I'm glad Fred has a wife cause I would be worried if he didn't have a wife.

And we'll close this poorly laid out mess with that last one from Dark Gizzard. If he didn't have a wife would he be a homo? Or what? Apparently Freddie the Pig (and absolutely no offense intended to the fictional Freddie the Pig) dumped Wife Mark I about the time he "went Hollywood," & remained single & catting around until he latched on to Wife Mark II a few years ago. So for 17 yrs. he wasn't married. Are you worried now? (And come to think of it, maybe Wife Mark II latched on to him. Might be one of those Reagan deals: Ronnie didn't really want to be president, but Nancy ["Mommie"] wanted to be queen, so...)

Pardon the crappy layout on this one. I've yet to master the blockquote function, mainly because it doesn't work in any sensible, intuitive way. WordPress or Typepad, here I come!!!!

UPDATE (25 November 2007 @ 1759 PDT): Having picked up a smidgen of HTML in the ensuing months, your editor has managed to get all the indentations correct.