The Obvious Restated

Little John - Time Longer Than Rope

lloyd charmers - desiderata - frm records 1972 reggae

Feeling The Edge Of The Carving Knife

Baby/infant now at it. Keep it up you fucking brat.

Why We Kill*

It takes but the slightest provocation. We are currently being provoked by the failure of the nine-volt battery in our bunker's smoke alarm, which will necessitate leaving the bunker in order to purchase a new battery. Our only other option is to sit here & listen to the fucking detector chirp until we are driven mad(der) by it & go out to murder.

Either way, it takes almost nothing (Of which there is plenty.) to make us want to slaughter indiscriminately. What an awful, awful world, that makes those stuck in it murderers. Stop driving us crazy & we may let you live.

We haven't been irked to further madness by the barking dogs & howling baby or babies yet today, but the day is still young & we've only been awake & "functioning" for an hr. However, if the crazy person whose babbling has been extremely audible through the window recently doesn't keep his crazy mouth shut today there will be blood!!

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*Because no jury would convict us, George Zimmerman-style. (Hah, we thought this was just boilerplate hate, pain, rage & fear; turns out there is a message: "If he can do it, why can't we?" Hell, we have legitimate reasons to kill virtually everyone who crosses our radar. Zimmerman was just a racist asshole.)

Miss Us?

Cable telebision, telephone & iNternet were all out. No difference; equally numb either way.

We Kid You Not

2. Claudia (Aubrey Peeples) says she knows a shortcut from Beverly Hills to Van Nuys.
LOLOLOL. There is no shortcut to anywhere, anymore, ever.

Once there were faster ways to get there, 'though not always literal shortcuts. But no more. Why, we mumbled into our oats-meal, we can remember when ...

The Grift Isn't Always Enough

If Nixon's plumbers breaking into Democratic Party headquarters at the Watergate was a "third-rate burglary," what in hell can we call Congressional office burglaries allegedly committed by someone who worked for Michele Bachmann?

The U.S. Capitol Police (USCP) announced Monday it arrested a legislative director for Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) in connection with a string of burglaries at the Rayburn House Office Building.

Police charged Javier Sanchez, 37, with Theft II.

“Earlier this year the United States Capitol Police was apprised of thefts that occurred in the Rayburn House Office Building,” spokesperson Shennell Antro told The Hill in a statement.

“The USCP conducted an investigation and were able to identify a subject. The investigation resulted in the arrest of 37 year old Javier Sanchez of Virginia. The arrest took place on 7/11/2013. Sanchez has been charged with Theft II.”

Dan Kotman, a spokesman for Bachmman, said in email that "as of 7/12/2013, the person in question is no longer with the office. Any further questions should be directed to Capitol Police."

Bachmann announced earlier this year that she would not seek reelection to Congress in 2014.

Congresswoman Bachmann not having introduced any legislation that's gone anywhere in the six yrs. she's been disgracing the state of Minnesota in the House of Representatives, we wonder why her office even employed a "legislative director." Maybe he turned to crime out of sheer boredom. One day he must've faced the grim truth; he was never going to have legislation to direct anywhere, it would all be "referred to committee," & never be heard of again. An even grimmer thought: This non-record would not look good on the resume. Boredom nothing, he probably figured it'd be a long time between jobs & he'd need some extra cash.

Annals of crime dispatched, it is our firm guesstimate that every time the Congresswoman lies or makes a factually-challenged statement Sweet Baby Jesus kills both a puppy & a kitten.

We'd like Sweet Baby J. to leave the kittens & puppies alone & kill her (W/ votes? Maybe, maybe not.)uh, take poor deluded Michele back to heaven w/ him before wea crazy person somewhere gets so fed up wehe or she takes law & justice into ourhis or her own hands. As she claims the Prez did in 2012. You remember when Obama whipped out his magic wand & gave the vote to all Latinas under 30 or something, last yr. sometime don't you? Representative Bachmann does, from (0:29) to (0:44); you listen & tell us exactly what she says/means.Added surprise (if you've been under your rock all day; this is all from latish yesterday, & even here on the trailing edge of time it's almost tomorrow already): Member of Congress Bachmann didn't develop this theory from scratch.

We do believe her when she says she'd like to get her hands (& ...?) all over the Prez's "magic wand." You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.

All kidding & smut aside, when she leaves office, if she isn't institutionalized (as any reputable head-candler would advise) can she be put in an attic (or basement, whatever) room & told not to come out if anyone comes visiting? It's Christian therapy that's worked well for many other crazy aunts & uncles. And it's really as much for her sake as ours. And visitors.

This one is shorter & has some different words, yet wastes (0:20) w/ a title card & a nimrod who is both off-camera & off-mic questioning the crazy woman. Imbeciles, all of them.

English Value Human Life As Well, Also

Maybe there won't always be an England. If the limeys continue to be too weak (inbreeding; they're all twelfth cousins or closer) & too dense (inbreeding; they're all twelfth cousins or closer) to realize they're too weak to swim the Channel or to qualify for Her Majesty's elite gov't.-sanctioned murder squad, the S.A.S., they may not be much longer for the increasingly hot & wet planet we have to share w/ the rest of you.

P.S.: We are not quite as cruel & heartless as we'd have you believe, we do sympathize & empathize w/ the families & friends of the deceased, one of whom seemed to be doing something not immediately evil (while managing to draw attention to herself, naturally). Running through Wales on the hottest day of the yr.* to qualify for a chance to murder the enemies of the ruling classes? Mmmm ...

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*Oh this is sad. If this temperature kills their best & brightest it is over for Albion.

The deaths occurred on the hottest day of the year so far in Wales, with temperatures reaching 30C (86F) in Powys.

Mississippi Values Human Life As At Least Equivalent To Car Stereo

It's legal so shut up!

Yes, this is the image that illustrated the story.

By Dan Cannon, GunsSaveLives.net

A resident of Jackson, MS came out of his home just before 6am on Friday to find someone burglarizing his vehicle.

The homeowner opened fire, striking the suspect, identified as Quardious Thomas, 20.

When police arrived they found Thomas wounded in the vehicle. He was taken to an area hospital where he died.

Police say the homeowner will not face charges for the shooting.

According to clarionledger.com,

Jackson Police Department spokeswoman Colendula Green said the unidentified homeowner was protected by the state’s castle doctrine law.

“It’s your property and you have the right to protect your property,” Green said.

Police are investigating the deceased suspect’s possible involvement in other recent car break-ins in the area.

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GunsSaveLives.net is a leading source of news where [sic] ordinary citizens use firearms to save themselves from criminals and crime. Visit them here http://gunssavelives.net.

From Carlson's Daily Crapper.

iPhone Kills Woman

Progress through electricity:

Last Thursday, Ma Ailun, a 23-year-old woman from China's western Xinjiang region and a flight attendant with China Southern Airlines, was electrocuted when she took a call on the charging mobile telephone, the official Xinhua news agency quoted police as saying on Sunday.

"We are deeply saddened to learn of this tragic incident and offer our condolences to the Ma family. We will fully investigate and cooperate with authorities in this matter," Apple said in an e-mail.

The fewer people we see
staring at their hands the better.

Apple declined to comment on details, such as whether this was an isolated case.

Ma's sister tweeted on Sina's microblog saying that Ma collapsed and died after using her charging iPhone 5 and urged users to be careful, a message that went viral on the site.

Darwin smiles.

Highly Recommended

By m.e.

This is real good. It’s a speech and Q-and-A George Carlin did at the National Press Club in May of ’99. It runs close to an hour and it’s worth it. Mr. Carlin speaks mainly of the corruption of the English language and while some of it may be familiar to you from his albums and specials, much of it is not…

CFL Wrap-Up

B.C. Lions 17, Edmonton Eskimos 3. (Wk. Three already?)

Close To The Edge

The good times may be over.

And while HUD has instructed authorities to do all that they can to avoid taking vouchers away from those who already have them, including granting them flexibility to dip into some other funds, that may not last. “It’s probable we’ll start to see people actually have to be kicked out of units, have vouchers taken away,” Miksch said. Authorities will have to “say sorry, I know you just got out of your car into an apartment, but you have to go back, hope you didn’t sell your car,” he added.

Don't push us.

How The Mighty Have Fallen

Various musical aggregations that people actually paid to see 30, 35 yrs. ago that will appear free at Pershing Square this summer under the aegis of the L.A. City Dep't of Parks & Rec.:

• The Psychedelic Furs (TONIGHT, 2000-2300!)
• Bow Wow Wow
• The Smithereens
• The Tubes
• X (We're sure we paid to see them once, maybe twice.)

And fuck you, "artists:"

• At the request of many artists no audio, video or still photography equipment is permitted on the venue.

What about our gawd-damn "art?"

Legend Of The Golden Arches

WOOD

Approx. 12 Miles From Salt Water

Free Speech Up-Date

We realize not all commenters are perfect (not even those who comment here) but this is absurd:

Maybe these avatars of evil should take a serious look at how they're living their lives. And maybe we should check the mail & the spam trap more often, but we certainly don't expect our (close) iNternet acquaintances to be treated like dirt by those fucking asshole robots or whatever at Google/Bugger.

Plutonium Shower

No vacation for us again this yr. The flight was booked, hotel rooms reserved, Tahiti here we come but now we think not. Good one, Froggies.

This is worse than what the United Snakes did to the Bikini islanders.

From 1960 to 1996, France carried out 210 nuclear tests, 17 in the Algerian Sahara and 193 in French Polynesia in the South Pacific, symbolised by the images of a mushroom cloud over the Mururoa atoll. For decades, France argued that the controlled explosions were clean. Jacques Chirac, the French president, controversially resumed nuclear atoll explosions in the South Pacific shortly after being elected in 1995.

Le Parisien said the documents "lifted the lid on one of the biggest secrets of the French army". It said papers showed that on 17 July 1974, a test exposed Tahiti to 500 times the maximum allowed level of plutonium fallout.

Bruno Barillot, who has investigated the impacts of the nuclear tests for the Polynesian government, complained of the high levels of thyroid cancers and leukaemia in Polynesia. He said the declassified documents revealed Tahiti had "literally been showered with plutonium for two days" during the Mururoa test; from the outset France knew the impact spread further than it publicly admitted. But of the 2,050 pages declassified, 114 remained blacked out.

At least the Americans got the Bikinians off the atoll before they dosed it.

THE URGE TO KILL & KILL AGAIN!!

Will no one rid us of The Wall Street Journal? It started this a.m. w/ the usual "helping people who aren't millionaires turns them into even greater parasites than they already are" crap from an asshole (Obvious? Well, yeah. Where else does crap originate?) hedge-fund manager who probably has to put a lip-lock on Rupert Murdoch's atrophied love-muscle (Murdoch's whore wife dumped him so he's probably at loose ends) for his crap to be published in the Journal.

Of course the load of dung is "subscribers only."

We'll leave the rational response to the soon-to-be-a-bloody-fucking-mess-if-we-have-anything-to-do-therew/ dickwad's column to Scott Keyes (Where've we heard that name, or part of it, before?) of Think Progress.

In reality, his claim that homeless shelters cause homelessness mixes up the direction of causality. People are not poor because of charity anymore than people get headaches because Tylenol exists. Indeed, the causes of homelessness are vast. As the National Coalition for the Homeless explains, the rise in foreclosures, a lack of well-paying jobs and affordable housing, as well as the decline in public assistance are all factors that contribute to homelessness in the United States. Others can include domestic violence, medical emergencies, and mental illness. Not included as a cause of homelessness is because people volunteering at shelters.

[LEARN TO TYPE ENGLISH GOOD, MORAN!! — M.B.]

Even if we consider his solution to homelessness — take the effort you spent volunteering and use it to line your own pockets instead — at face value, it completely falls apart when considering economic evidence over the past 40 years. Median household income has actually declined, even as CEO pay has shot up exponentially. Combine that with the fact that the cost of living has increased rapidly and the result is massive income inequality in the United States. Kessler may imagine a trickle-down world where unbridled economic growth is a salve that we can use to cure all our problems, but it bears no resemblance to the world we actually live in.

As a one-time homeless person ourself we are righteously obligated to smash hedge-funder Andy Kessler's speaking hole, jaw & typing fingers to pulp, & then grind them in a fucking garbage disposal. Might just pull/cut out his tongue & toss it in the Insinkerator as well. He's obviously too damn old to learn or know better; we'll cut him no more slack (Though we might just cut him.) than he seems to cut for anyone whose net worth is under millions & millions of dollars.

If our anti-depressant makes us just a bit more manic we will gladly take a fucking Greyhound to the Bay Area & deal. And if chump-ass punk Kessler thinks that is not a threat, we will point out to him & the world that we have nothing more to lose, no further reason to live, & not so many yrs. left to live w/ nothing & for nothing. So it would abso-fucking-lutely be worth crushing this clown to a pulp. And, we'd be remembered as a hero throughout history. Getting excited thinking about it. And look at what a real American we are, believing that violence solves all problems.

Our desire to be rid of Murdoch's cage-liner was only increased by another fucking clown from The W.S.J., one Stephen Moore, whose cleverness can be seen in the "an $8.00 job is better than no job," statement he makes at the end. Readjustment of his sour face cannot come too soon. Perhaps he & a few of the parasitic Walton heirs can be strung up by their heels Mussolini-style in front of a Mall★Wart Store where none of the wage-slaves get enough hrs. a wk. to get the no doubt crummy Mall★Wart medical insurance & most of them are paid so little they qualify for S.N.A.P. Then the workers could whack them w/ a stick as if they were fucking piñatas until they bled to death. (Gawd bless America! Kill kill kill!!)

You suck, I hate you, please die. AND DO NOT GO TO CORPORATE OR CAPITALIST ORGANIZATIONS FOR news about the economy OR ANYTHING THE HELL ELSE!!

It should certainly be obvious why we are absolutely ready for someone to bomb the Journal's offices. And don't give us any of that bombing newspapers is wrong crap. If it's O.K. by Ann Coulter, it's O.K. by us.

On the June 29 edition of Fox News' Hannity & Colmes, right-wing pundit Ann Coulter called her previous suggestion that Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh should have bombed The New York Times' building "prescient," given the Times' publication of a June 23 article detailing a Treasury Department program designed to monitor international financial transactions for terrorist activity.

As quoted in an August 26, 2002, New York Observer article, Coulter had previously stated: "My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not go to the New York Times Building." McVeigh's April 19, 1995, bomb attack destroyed the Alfred P. Murrah federal building in Oklahoma City, killing 168 people.

Everybody Talks About It

Current bunker temp.: 81°F. (W/ the fan-chill factor it only feels like 80°F.) And it's a wet heat. So effing wet there's cloud cover & a 30% chance of rain. Humidity not much above three zillion percent.

NB: We're sure it's much worse in other areas, sectors & zones, but, this being an exhibition (not a competition) no one is obligated to share their suffering or to try to top us here.