Freddie Thompson, Crusading Prosecutor & Boy Genius

Good ol' boy Freddie in the local cage-liner:

He was "attacking crime and public corruption," boasts a video played at his campaign events. During a candidate debate this month, Thompson said he spent those years "prosecuting most of the major federal crimes in middle Tennessee -- most of the major ones." But a review of the 88 criminal cases Thompson handled at the U.S. attorney's office in Nashville, from 1969 to 1972, reveals a different and more human portrait -- that of a young lawyer learning the ropes on routine cases involving gambling, mail theft and, in one instance, talking dirty on CB radio.

He's a liar, he's lazy, & Nixon didn't think highly of him:

In this May 1973 recording, he shared his concern with then-chief of staff Alexander Haig. "He's talking to Fred Thompson. I said you're not --," Haig begins. "Oh sh--, he's dumb as hell. Fred Thompson," Nixon interjects. "Who is he? He won't say anything." [...] In his memoir of the Watergate era, Thompson admits to secretly alerting the White House to key evidence as it was discovered by congressional investigators. Former Watergate committee investigator Scott Armstrong told ABC News that Thompson's cooperation with the White House undermined the investigation.

Of course, he has as much of a chance at the Republican nomination as Ron Paul does. Too bad, as either one would be a worthy opponent. For Lyndon Johnson.