Turkey Trots

Bush forces Campfire Girl to "touch the turkey."
The WaPo gives the full story on the president/turkey connection. (Well, they didn't admit that every president in Just Another Blog [From L. A.]™'s living memory has been a turkey, & that as far back as William Howard Taft they've all been gobblers, but that would be a little too much to expect from the Old Media. It's true, though.)

And the story gives us a chance to use the following quote. In response to the poll to name the two gobblers, Bush perpetuated Cheney's image as a "tough guy," w/ this line:

These names were "certainly better than the names the vice president suggested, which was 'Lunch' and 'Dinner,' " the president joked.

No photos of Veep Cheney lurking about the Rose Garden, shotgun in hand, were made available. Shame, really, as these two birds had been raised w/ plenty of human contact, so they wouldn't wig out in the stressful photo-op situation. Perfect targets for Dead-Eye Dick, in other words.

More from the Republican spin machine:

In 1987, Ronald Reagan deflected questions about pardoning Oliver North in the Iran-contra case by joking about pardoning the turkey Charlie, who was already heading to a petting zoo.

Not an "actual" pardon, just deflection. And older Bush must have been so happy not to be caught in the Iran-contra mess ("I was out of the loop," remember?) that he decided to keep distracting the nation w/ the turkey pardon.

The [George Herbert W.] Bush library is no help; staffers there are as surprised as anyone to hear that their president pardoned the first turkey. "Until this morning we didn't know that he started it," archivist Zachary Roberts says. He'd always thought, in fact, that it was Truman. Roberts will make note of the presidential first. But it probably won't make a difference to the public, who has grown used to swallowing flexible history.
[...]
"The poultry board gave [Truman] turkeys every year," Kelly adds, "and we think they probably ended up on the dinner table."

Harry S. Truman & The Naked, Still-Living Lunch

The turkey tale is the same over at the Dwight D. Eisenhower Library, where the records of the destination of each turkey in each year of the Ike presidency read, "Turkey to be dressed" -- and we ain't talking tuxedos -- then delivered to the president's table.
[...]
At some point in presidential Thanksgiving history, the turkeys presented annually stopped heading for the White House table and headed off to petting zoos.

If only we could say the same for most of our presidents.