Haw Haw Haw!!

Good news for the planet:

Retail sales plunge by largest amount on record Consumers curb spending on range of goods; falling gas prices contribute

Har har. Fuck you all, you stupid food tubes. In one end, out the other, empty inside. Your empty world of emptiness is about to become a vacuum. (We're especially hoping for a massacre of "shoppers" & consumers at Santa Monica's Third Street Promenade, where, as we type, we are sitting nursing a large coffee, though they don't call it that here, if you know what we mean, followed by an army of bulldozers shoving both the worshippers' corpses & the temples of commodity fetishism where they worshipped over the Palisades to block polluters from using the PCH. Nothing yet from the Obama Administration to be, but we're hoping for an answer soon.) We wish you only the best of luck breathing in there. The laughter you hear is the editorial staff. The Krauts may have invented the word "schadenfreude," but we're refined the concept to a vicious, diamond-like hardness here. (If we do say so ourself.)