We'd Exhort You to "Eat The Rich," But They're Filled w/ Additives

Or: Fall of the Roman Empire, Take Two. (For all the computer wienies out there, "take two" means "Version 2.0.") Just as the little people are, America's rich people are cutting back in the current economy. (Face it, if your dollars aren't going as far as they used to, neither are wealthy people's, because the percentage of your output that they take is going down too.) But don't for a minute think Mr. Moneybags is having the cook make more pasta dishes & fewer $23.99/lb. free-range, no-hormone steak dinners. Matter of fact, the L. A. Times story that inspired this rant doesn't really indicate just what the rich are cutting back on, it mostly demonstrates what crap they waste their money on, especially if they're in Los Angeles or New Yawk City. For example:

Although consumers with above-average disposable incomes have been notching back since the third quarter of last year, they aren't curtailing purchases of "experiences," such as theater tickets and meals out, said Pam Danziger, owner of Unity Marketing, a research firm that focuses on luxury markets. Danziger herself draws the line at stopping Botox and Restylane treatments, which set her back $800 or so every four months. "I'm not about to give that up," she said. "That's my affordable luxury."

Or:

"People are very concerned about everything they ingest, eat, put on their skin because of what it's doing biochemically to their body," said Pao, whose business helps companies develop turnaround strategies. "So the organic food market is kind of blowing out the door even though it's like four times as much as regular food." At Erewhon Natural Foods Market in Los Angeles, where "body ecologists" dispense tips from the tonic bar and customers pay $15 for a Mint Chip Energizer drink or $25 for Blood of the Dragon, business is great. If the drink they select doesn't already include it, most people add "super deer antler" (believed to boost sexual strength, virility and fertility) at $2 a drop, said Mitzi Poulin, a store manager. "Sometimes your drink can cost you $40 for just one cup," she said. Some sales come from people who partied too hard the night before. "They come and say, 'Oh, I have a hangover, can you fix me?' " Poulin said that in April, revenue was up 11% compared with the same month last year. "I cannot say that the recession affects us," she said.

Not at all dissimilar to the superstitions of later period Romans. "Super deer antler." We gotcher "super deer antler" right here, Richie Rich. The Romans had an excuse, they weren't quite hep to science yet. What's w/ our "elites?" We can only hope that ordinary "real" Americans (not "white wine-sipping swells") pick up their pitchforks, light some torches, & head for the West Side of Los Angeles & the Upper West Side of Manhattan, murdering & pillaging all the way.