These Do Not Deserve To Be Called "News Alerts"

The Old Gray Lady cries "Wolf!!":

Melanie Oudin Beats Nadia Petrova to Reach Quarter Finals at U.S. Open

Twice:

Former Representative Joseph P. Kennedy II Won't Seek Senate Seat, A.P. Reports

Here's a motherfucking clue, publishers of Ross Douthat: If it doesn't involve the death of a famous & important person, or a hell of a lot of shit blowing up w/ concomitant deaths, it just isn't worth alerting us!!