The Good, The Burt & The Ugly

We read the first line ("There are times when I find myself thinking that all of America’s loons are on the far left, but then something like CPAC takes place.") & were ready for laughs until we clicked & saw it was typed by Burt Prelutsky, whose new full-time home is Joseph Farah's hive of birtherism & selling survival products to those a-feared the end times is a-comin', WND.

Intentional humor, then. Knowing it was at The DC we were going to be looking for admissions along the "While these people are right, they probably shouldn't make such a big deal out of it 'cause it sounds weird to, like, informed people" line, but now it's Burt behind the keyboard, we must steel ourself for attempts at humor one could expect from someone w/ a resume that includes "Dragnet," "McMillan & Wife," "Mary Tyler Moore," "Rhoda,""MASH," "Bob Newhart," "Family Ties," "Dr. Quinn" and "Diagnosis Murder."

OK, here we go. If we tug on the line, pull us up immediately!!

So far, nothing more amusing than a Henry Wallace reference.

But then Burt, offended by Paulistas booing war criminals, brings it, as the kids say. Brings it to the 1950s.

Frankly, outside of Texas’s 14th congressional district and CPAC, the only other competition Ron Paul could ever hope to win is the Mr. Magoo look-alike contest.

Sadly, after deciding Ron Paul was the only thing nutty about CPAC, Burt lost the premise of his opening sentence, & went on for over half his column to compare two giants of the 19th century, J.D. Rockefeller & Karl Marx, because this comparison has never previously been made.*

We're probably being crueler than necessary here, & it's our own fault for expecting the entire piece to be about CPAC loons, when it's more along the lines of Mr. P. asking himself "Do I have enough crap for two pages worth at TheDC, where Tucker likes two-page & more items that increase his page count?"

The clue being the stand-up transitions:

Speaking of crazy people, in case you didn’t hear about it

&

The other day, I found myself thinking

That can be an awful surprise.

*In truth, we think it has, & by Mr. Prelutsky; nagonna type the phrases necessary to confirm or deny it.