Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Tuesday, Trash Day

Again comes Jonah w/ this subtitle to the online version of his L. A. Times column of today:
Evolution of religious bigotry The cowardice and intolerance of slapping a Darwin fish on your car bumper.
Dead tree edition:
Christian Baiting
First there's blather about the Dutch movie stating the Quran is pretty vicious & violent. At least as bad as the Old & New Testaments, yes, possibly even worse. But Doughbob doesn't even bother to condemn the dirty Moooooslims, he whines momentarily that
European and U.N. leaders are going through the usual motions of theatrical hand-wringing, heaping all of their anger on Wilders for sowing "hatred."
Then comes what's really on his tiny mind, Jeezis fish & those "Darwin" stickers:
In America, the easiest place to find this ancient symbol is on the back of cars. Recently, however, it seems as if Jesus fish have become outnumbered by Darwin fish. No doubt you've seen these too. The fish symbol is "updated" with little feet coming off the bottom, and "IXOYE" or "Jesus" is replaced with either "Darwin" or "Evolve." I find Darwin fish offensive. First, there's the smugness. The undeniable message: Those Jesus fish people are less evolved, less sophisticated than we Darwin fishers. The hypocrisy is even more glaring. Darwin fish are often stuck next to bumper stickers promoting tolerance or admonishing random motorists that "hate is not a family value." But the whole point of the Darwin fish is intolerance; similar mockery of a cherished symbol would rightly be condemned as bigoted if aimed at blacks or women or, yes, Muslims.
First of all, you stupid fuck, what "cherished symbol" of black people or women is there to "mock?" (You want to make up some bumper stickers that say "Martin Luther Coon?" And of course no woman has ever been mocked by a conservative. Is the "Iron My Shirt!" bumper sticker order ready yet?) Secondly, do you not understand (of course you do, you can't really be as fucking dense as you pretend to be) the difference between something that one is born (a breeding group or a sex) & something that one chooses to be (a Catholic, a Moooooslim, a libertarian, a flat-earther, a UFO-believer, whatever).
It's not that secular progressives support Muslim religious fanatics, but they reserve their passion and scorn for religious Christians who are neither fanatical nor inclined to use violence.
Actually, they're just sick & tired of seeing that stupid Jeezis fish on the cars of morons, so they came up w/ an answer to it. Try unbunching your panties for a few seconds, J. G., it's just a bumper sticker. And in a nation that identifies itself to pollsters as somewhere around 85% Xtian, what exactly is the point of the Jeeezis fish anyway? It's not like the stupid story you tell of the Turkish guy you met in Istanbul, who thought he had to sneak you (a goober of Jewish extraction but not much faith) the "fish sign." And let's think again about statements like "neither fanatical or inclined to use violence." Kansas Board of Education? Eric Rudolph? Some of your little "harmless" Xtian pals are just as ready to impose their religious law over everybody in this country as any Mooooslims are in other nations. And don't think that any Jooooos would get a break, either.
The Darwin fish ostensibly symbolizes the superiority of progressive-minded science over backward-looking faith. I think this is a false juxtaposition, but I would have a lot more respect for the folks who believe it if they aimed their brave contempt for religion at those who might behead them for it.
Just as gay rights advocates condemn, for example, the executions in Iran of people for homosexual activity, but don't make as big a fuss about it as they do about various issues here in the U. S., an alleged democracy where the rights promised to all can, once in a while, actually be extended to all, so there is little point in aiming our brave contempt for obscurantist superstition of the Moooooslim ilk against any one in a country where five-time-a-day foot washers number some two per cent of the population, & are much more likely to be scared of crazed Xtians & /or Jooooos (Remember when Sikhs were killed after 11 September, 2001 merely because they wear turbans, Jonah?) than we are of them. As soon as we see as many crescent moons w/ stars as we see Calvins pissing on somebody on the rear windows of moron-mobiles, we'll find something w/ which to get back at the towelheads. In the meantime, Jonah, who started it? Whose holier-than-thou activities began this entire fish war? Huh?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

M Bouffant, this is g from Sadly No! I just saw you have Jenny Lens in your blogroll! I've been trying to contact her about rock photos!

What's your contact address?

M. Bouffant said...

The Editor Responds:

"What up, g?" (Always wanted to say that!)

We may be reached @ m.bouffant@gmail.com, if that's what you meant; if you're looking for contact info for Ms. Lens, it's all on her site, click away.

P. S.: This response is coming from the Santa Monica Central Library. Small world, innit?