Thursday, July 18, 2013

Why We Kill*

It takes but the slightest provocation. We are currently being provoked by the failure of the nine-volt battery in our bunker's smoke alarm, which will necessitate leaving the bunker in order to purchase a new battery. Our only other option is to sit here & listen to the fucking detector chirp until we are driven mad(der) by it & go out to murder.

Either way, it takes almost nothing (Of which there is plenty.) to make us want to slaughter indiscriminately. What an awful, awful world, that makes those stuck in it murderers. Stop driving us crazy & we may let you live.

We haven't been irked to further madness by the barking dogs & howling baby or babies yet today, but the day is still young & we've only been awake & "functioning" for an hr. However, if the crazy person whose babbling has been extremely audible through the window recently doesn't keep his crazy mouth shut today there will be blood!!

*Because no jury would convict us, George Zimmerman-style. (Hah, we thought this was just boilerplate hate, pain, rage & fear; turns out there is a message: "If he can do it, why can't we?" Hell, we have legitimate reasons to kill virtually everyone who crosses our radar. Zimmerman was just a racist asshole.)


Weird Dave said...

Just take the battery out.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I followed Weird Dave's advice three years ago.

No problems.

Weird Dave said...

Please be advised that taking the advice of an intoxicated idiot may not be the best course of action.