Thursday, September 6, 2012

Had It Been Us ...

Mr. Bicycle would still be staggering through the bush looking for his actual pin-dick & his US$2,000.00 pseudo-penis.
The cops were very professional, listened to both sides (though we were cuffed momentarily while they sorted it out), and let us go in opposite directions after we both declined to press charges. I owe thanks to the Martinez family, who were cooking food in their yard and told the police what had happened.
Oh, maybe not, but one never knows. We do have it in us. (It often tries to get out.) And we sure as fucking hell would have pressed charges. Seriously, someone knocks us down, then kicks dirt & rocks on us & then actually kicks us, a black eye would be the least of his worries. Blood would be spilled, & not ours.

And what's the deal w/ the fucking police showing up before justice can be administered? Who squealed?

Last: "Cooking food?" Really? They were cooking food? As opposed to newspapers, or a sidewalk?

5 comments:

Weird Dave said...

I promise I will never run you over on my ($1500USD used, penis extending) bicycle.

M. Bouffant said...

Exercise Editor:
Yikes. We've been thinking, sort of, about blowing US$150 or so on a bike from Target or Costco. At least it'd be new.

Weird Dave said...

Oh, it depends on what you want to do with it.
I would not recommend riding my favorite trails and tracks on a Costco special, although for around town stuff it's a pretty good deal.

But remember, I spent $150.00 (used) for my commuter bike and I have somewhere around $200.00 in accessories on it. To make it really useful takes some extras (lock (or, in my case locks), lights, rack, bags, tubes, etc.)

And about that penis extending thing? At least three inches. My wife cannot wait for me to get back from my rides.

BadTux said...

Bouffant, he had to clarify that the Martinez family was cooking food because in that neighborhood, it's more likely that a family cooking in their yard would be cooking meth. Just sayin ;).

- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

M. Bouffant said...

Redundancy Editor:
Ho, two minds, one thought! That is exactly what occurred to us, but we resisted the urge.