Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Convenience Charge

We almost forgot these. Not that we've ever been big fans of the stadium/arena musical event (if you can't hock a loogie on the lead shouter, your experience has been less than authentic) but we wouldn't pay this to see ourself on stage.
Will call is free, but they'll charge you $2.50 to print your own tickets. Didn't grab the next frame, but you'll be given the opportunity to pay $20.00 for parking before you check out.

Offensive Only In Its Lameness, And So Funny We Forgot To Laugh

But we're thinking of crying. This was chosen for the Daily Caller's feed.
Chosen. Someone picked it, on purpose.

Conservative humor. About sex. Much worse than chafing. Anywhere.

LAist CD Reviews: Jeff Beck Sells Out; Also: Stooges, Black Flag, Old Man Mose

Wretches like us like to pretend that our hearing can still differentiate between downloaded MP3s & a CD burntripped to the hard drive. So the CD Mailbag seems aimed directly at us.

The original (By Mr. David. Only his hairdresser knows for sure.) mix of Raw Power is available again. Never had a problem w/ Mr. David's mix ourself. Could've been different, but it worked, didn't it? Close enough for rock & roll.
Iggy And The Stooges - Raw Power: Legacy Edition (2 CD) and Deluxe Edition (3 CD, DVD and 7-inch single) - Sony Legacy Editions - April 13 (Legacy) / April 27 (Deluxe)
Probably sold out (our moral compass won't allow shelling out over maybe $35.00 max. for live music anyway) but Jeff Beck performs at the Nokia Theater on Saturday, April 17 with special guest Zappa Plays Zappa. Tickets at Ticketmaster, (in support of this: Jeff Beck - Emotion and Commotion - Rhino Records - April 13) would be worth effort, maybe. Though,
Beck’s pulled a Wes Montgomery: hired an orchestra and a couple of dynamite female singers, started covering familiar songs, and produced what might be the most accessible record he’s ever made. Finally, here’s a Jeff Beck album for people who enjoy good guitar playing without acrobatics, with the emphasis on melody, tone and coloration rather than fast finger picking. The orchestral pieces are suitably grandiose, Beck playing the melodies of “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” and Puccini’s “Nessun Dorma” like the featured soloist at Carnegie Hall.
Pulled more of a Rod Stewart (whom we saw rasping w/ J.B. in 1969 at Seattle's Eagles' Auditorium) we'd say. Maybe not.

This we'd like to hear:
 Keith Morris declines to do a Flag song at all, instead honky-tonking his way through Jimmie Rodgers’ “In The Jailhouse Now” with a band that includes SST vets Mike Watt and Joe Baiza.
Various Artists - Gimme Gimme Gimme: Reinterpreting Black Flag - The Secret Life Of Records - April 20
Good song. Mr. Morris is a decent human being & has a sense of humor, unlike some other former B.F. vocalists, & apparently taste as good as ours.

Oh, bugger: (Available on Itunes April 20.) iTunes?

Isn't the point of CD reviews old person's music, presented in a way that old people (including those who run what's left of the recording cos.) get. Just one of the recordings reviewed is by a new act. For example:
Eternally hip at a ripe old eighty-one, Mose Allison returns to the studio for the first time in over a decade and finds himself with a good amount left to say.
Mose Allison - The Way Of The World - Anti-Records - Available Now
Also in the old folks at their pianos vein: A Tom Lehrer collection.

Off Theme Already: UFOlogy

The WaPo has five freaking pp. on the search for P-Funk's mothership. From Farren, who has (besides the obviously obligatory P-F) a link so clever that we are impressed (though bitter it didn't occur to us).

(Not this one. This is a gratuitous sound effect. We really should podcast. If only we could fix it so the audience were, as here, always their own engineer. Start to fade it at 19 secs., 'K?)

Today's Theme Is: Idiots

We just had to point out that Stanley Fish, like Sarah Palin, is an idjit. This is not a great revelation, but if he wants to put this inane blather before us, he deserves to be abused.

Hell, we needn't abuse him, he abuses hinself:
Postmodernism announces (loudly and often) that a supposedly neutral, objective rationality is always a construct informed by interests it neither acknowledges nor knows nor can know. Meanwhile science goes its merry way endlessly inventing and proliferating technological marvels without having the slightest idea of why. The “naive faith” Habermas criticizes is not a faith in what science can do — it can do anything — but a faith in science’s ability to provide reasons, aside from the reason of its own keeping on going, for doing it and for declining to do it in a particular direction because to do so would be wrong.
We love it when postmodernism is attacked by a ninny so deep in his own conventional, never examined wisdom & morality (or whatever Fish thinks that his mumblings are) he can't see the forest or the trees.

Go, Fish!

Liars, Damned Liars, & Palin & Gingrich

A simple statement:
The next day, at a convention of Southern Republicans, Palin scratched back, poking fun at Obama for "all the vast experience that he acquired as a community organizer."

If there were any doubts that Sarah Palin is a total idiot, she settled them with that single statement.

Was the former half-term governor of Alaska really claiming that the president of the United States has no more experience on nuclear matters than she does?
Sure she was. In the half-term gov.'s world, fifteen mos. as President & Commander-in-Chief isn't long enough to learn anything. After all, it took her several yrs. at five different institutions of higher learning not to learn anything.

Lest we forget, Newton Leroy Gingrich has a Ph.D.in history from Tulane. It took him 10 yrs. not to learn anything.

One thing Newt does know is damning w/ faint praise.
"She's attractive, she's articulate, she has energy," Gingrich continued in the interview set to air Sunday on CNN's State of The Union. "Watch the size of her crowds…And I think whether that translates into something bigger later or whether she's just a very significant person for the rest of her life, she is a real player, nobody should underestimate her."

Gingrich also said Palin's prominence in the Republican Party will continue, regardless of whether she decides to mount a presidential bid in 2012.

"I think she has the potential to fill a niche for a very long time, particularly in an age of cable television and talk radio when you can build your particular market and your audience, and they can love you and come to your meetings and do things with you, and she's done, I think the last couple months she's been very impressive," he said.
Does that sound sexist? Keep her in her niche on the tee vee? Does the Republican version of feminism say that the highest position a woman can aspire to is Oprah, just more reactionary? Where are the angry PUMAs to condemn this affront to womanhood?

Lexicon Deviltry

There are no "bad" words, only bad editors.

Not A Bad Deal?

Los Angeles, CA -- Paramount Pictures is exploring a new frontier by participating in an offer to sell Seagate hard drives with a copy of the latest "Star Trek" movie and 20 other films already on board.
The one-month offer, which both companies called an industry first, would combine a 500-gigabyte hard drive with a free version of 2009's "Star Trek" for an online promotional price of $100. An empty 500 GB Seagate hard drive usually sells for $140.
The pre-loaded movies come with a Windows-based digital rights management system that prevents file sharing. They take up about 50 GB of the drive itself.
Associated Press
Further research indicates this may not be a good deal.

Going crazy w/ the research indicates this is not in any way a good deal:
A choice of up to 20 popular Paramount titles can be unlocked for a fee:
* The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
* GI Joe
* Shooter
* The Hunt for Red October
* The Italian Job (2003)
* Ghost
* Patriot Games
* Beowulf
* Enemy at the Gates
* The Spiderwick Chronicles
* The Love Guru
* Coach Carter
* The Manchurian Candidate (2004)
* Nacho Libre
* Jackass 2.5
* A Plumm Summer
* Carriers
* Dance Flick
* Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius
* Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
A new category in motion picture entertainment, lower even than direct to DVD: Direct to hard drive. Unlock them for a mere $9.99 each, or spend valuable moments deleting this crap from your new drive, which may not last more than a couple of months. (Two remakes & Jackass 2.5? You wonder what goes through their minds.)

Fluffy Slippers

No 'bout a-dout it, we're as much a (non-ironic) fan of The Duke as we are of SpongeBob. (Obviously more the Squidward type, but you know.)
We talked for a while more, mostly about the current prices of Indian artifacts, which I had seen swoop suddenly upwards. I asked him if he owned the beautiful beaded and long-fringed plains rifle case — probably Sioux or Cheyenne — he carried in John Ford’s “The Searchers.”

“I wish you hadn’t said that,” he said, grinning. “I bet I’ve thought about it a hundred times. I can’t watch the picture because of it. I tried later to find it, but somebody smarter than I am must’ve gotten it.”

“Didn’t it occur to you, maybe on the last day, to just slip it into your duffle bag?”

“It does now.” (Laughter.)

Life On The Off-Ramp

Police: Nurse helps crash victim, gets carjacked

Published: 04/12/10 at 11:46 PM | Updated: 04/13/10 at 12:58 AM

LOS ANGELES (AP) — A nurse who left her vehicle at a gas station to help a nearby accident victim was the victim of a carjacking and dragged about 20 yards after she tried to grab the keys, Los Angeles police said Monday.

The nurse, who police didn’t identify, was filling up her car at the gas station near the city’s Pico-Union neighborhood early Sunday when she saw another car hit a traffic signal pole, which then fell on a pedestrian, Officer Carlos Ortega said.

The good Samaritan nurse left the keys in her car and ran across the street to help, police said. But Deserie Guzman allegedly hopped in the nurse’s car and started the engine.

When the nurse ran back, Guzman allegedly hit the gas, police said. The nurse was dragged until she fell, hit her head on the pavement and blacked out.

“I don’t know if she was holding on, trying to turn the car off, or got stuck on the steering wheel and couldn’t get loose,” Ortega said. “She wasn’t clear on that because she was knocked out.”

Guzman, 28, sped off toward the freeway, hit another car about a mile away and tried to flee on foot, he said.

Two men who saw what happened followed Guzman up an Interstate 10 onramp and offered her a ride, Ortega said.

“They didn’t see the first incident and thought she was trying to flee the scene of the accident. So they wanted her to think they’re helping her out,” he said.

Guzman got in the backseat, he said. The two men tried to take her to a California Highway Patrol station on the freeway, but it was closed. They returned to the scene of the first accident and flagged down police, who arrested Guzman.

Jasen Jack, 27, of Atlanta, who caused the original accident, was arrested on suspicion of driving while intoxicated.

The pedestrian who was hit with the traffic signal pole died. The nurse suffered minor injuries.
Theatre of The Ridiculous. Or a comedy relief episode of Adam-12, w/ a happy ending for all but the pedestrian done in by a falling standard. What a way to go.

Text Offset

Enough w/ the little squiggly lines. A soothing picture instead.

13 April: Jefferson's B-Day; Edict Of Nantes Endorsed; Apollo 13 Blow Up; Bad Day For Baseballers, Good Day For Firsts For Those Of African Heritage

Today is Tuesday, April 13, the 103rd day of 2010. There are 262 days left in the year. Other historical highlights.Today’s Highlight in History:
On April 13, 1743, the third president of the United States, Thomas Jefferson, was born in Shadwell, Va.
On this date:
In 1598, King Henry IV of France endorsed the Edict of Nantes, which granted rights to the Protestant Huguenots. The edict was abrogated in 1685 by King Louis XIV, who declared France entirely Catholic again.
In 1742, Handel’s “Messiah” was first performed publicly, in Dublin, Ireland.
In 1860, the Pony Express completed its inaugural run from St. Joseph, Mo., to Sacramento, Calif., in 10 days.
In 1870, the Metropolitan Museum of Art was incorporated in New York. The original museum opened in 1872.
In 1873, the Colfax Massacre or Colfax Riot (as the events are termed on the official state historic marker) occurred on Easter Sunday, April 13, 1873, in Colfax, Louisiana.
Estimates of the number of dead varied. Two U.S. Marshals who visited the site on April 15, 1873 and buried dead reported 62 fatalities. A military report to Congress in 1875 identified 81 black men who had been killed by name, and also estimated that 15-20 bodies were thrown into the Red River and another 18 secretly buried - for a grand total of "at least 105." A state historical marker from 1950 noted fatalities as three whites and 150 blacks. Taking into account all available estimates, author Charles Lane has estimated a minimum death toll of 62 and maximum death toll of 81.
Via The Divine One, & Wikipedia.
In 1943, President Franklin D. Roosevelt dedicated the Jefferson Memorial.
In 1954, Baseball Hall of Famer Hank Aaron made his major league debut with the Milwaukee Braves.
In 1958, American Van Cliburn, 23, won the first International Tchaikovsky Competition for piano in Moscow; Russian Valery Klimov won the violin competition.
In 1960, the U.S. Navy’s Transit 1B navigational satellite was successfully launched into orbit.
In 1965, Lawrence Bradford Jr., a 16-year-old from New York City, started work as the first black page to serve in either chamber of Congress.
In 1970, Apollo 13, four-fifths of the way to the moon, was crippled when a tank containing liquid oxygen burst. The astronauts managed to return safely. Astronaut Jack Swigert tells Mission Control "we've had a problem."
In 1972, the first major league baseball strike ended, eight days after it began.
In 1984, Christopher Wilder, the FBI's "most wanted man," accidentally killed himself as police moved in to arrest him in New Hampshire. Wilder was a suspect in the deaths, rapes and disappearances of 11 young women in eight states.
In 1986, Pope John Paul II visited the Great Synagogue of Rome in the first recorded papal visit to a Jewish house of worship.
In 1987, the Population Reference Bureau reported that the world's population had exceeded 5 billion.
In 1990, the Soviet Union accepted responsibility for the World War II murders of thousands of imprisoned Polish officers in the Katyn Forest, a massacre the Soviets had previously blamed on the Nazis. Soviet leader Mikhail Gorbachev gave Lithuania a two-day ultimatum, threatening to cut off some supplies to the Baltic republic if it didn't rescind laws passed since a March 11 declaration of independence.
In 1991, an advance team of U.N. observers arrived in Kuwait City to set up a peacekeeping force along the Kuwait-Iraqi border.
In 1992, the Great Chicago Flood took place as the city’s century-old tunnel system and adjacent basements filled with water from the Chicago River.
In 1997, Tiger Woods, 21, became the youngest person to win the Masters Tournament and the first person of African heritage to claim a major golf title.
In 1999, Dr. Jack Kervorkian was sentenced in Pontiac, Mich., to 10 to 25 years in prison for the second-degree murder of a Lou Gehrig's disease patient whose assisted suicide in 1998 was videotaped and shown on "60 Minutes." (Kevorkian ended up serving eight years.)
In 2000, President Bill Clinton, during a question-and-answer session with newspaper editors, heatedly said “I’m not ashamed” about being impeached and said he was “not interested” in being pardoned for any alleged crimes in the Monica Lewinsky scandal and Whitewater investigation.
In 2004, U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney said in Beijing that the United States doesn't support independence for Taiwan. Conceding a couple of "tough weeks in Iraq," President George W. Bush signaled he was ready to put more American troops on the front lines and use decisive force if necessary to restore order despite "gut-wrenching" televised images of fallen Americans. Barry Bonds hit his 661st homer, passing Willie Mays to take sole possession of third place on baseball's career list. Swimmer Michael Phelps won the 2003 Sullivan Award as the nation's top amateur athlete.
In 2005, as part of a deal to avoid the death penalty, a defiant Eric Rudolph, in back-to-back court appearances in Birmingham, Ala., and Atlanta, pleaded guilty to carrying out four bombings that killed two people and injured more than 120. Among the attacks were the deadly bombing at the 1996 Atlanta Olympics and two abortion clinics. Rudolph was sentenced to life in prison. Contract worker Jeffrey Ake was shown at gunpoint on a videotape aired by Al-Jazeera television, two days after he was kidnapped near Baghdad. Gymnast Paul Hamm received the 75th Sullivan Award as the nation’s top amateur athlete.
In 2007, U.S. regulators sought to determine whether a chemical was intentionally added in China to wheat gluten destined for pet food. Contaminated wheat gluten was in food reported linked to numerous deaths of dogs and cats in North America and prompted the recall of more than 90 brands of pet food.
In 2008, about 1,300 Iraqi police officers and soldiers were fired in Basra and Kut for failing to fight Shiite militias, the Iraqi government announced. Some were said to have merely switched sides during the battle. World Bank President Robert Zoellick urged immediate action to deal with mounting food prices that had caused hunger and deadly violence in several countries. Trevor Immelman won the Masters, becoming the first South African to wear a green jacket in 30 years. A construction worker's bid to curse the New York Yankees by planting a Boston Red Sox jersey in their new stadium was foiled when the home team removed the offending shirt from its burial spot. Physicist John A. Wheeler, who coined the term "black holes," died in Hightstown, N.J., at age 96. Also in 2008, the Zimbabwe Electoral Commission said it would recount ballots in 23 constituencies where the presidential totals in the March 29 voting were disputed, further delaying official results.
In 2009, the U.N. Security Council condemned North Korea’s April 5 rocket launch. President Barack Obama allowed Americans to make unlimited transfers of money and visits to relatives in Cuba, and said he was determined to halt the surge of piracy in the Indian Ocean off the Somalia coast. Former Detroit Tigers pitcher Mark “The Bird” Fidrych died in an accident on his Massachusetts farm; he was 54. Harry Kalas, whose “Outta here!” home run calls thrilled Philadelphia baseball fans, died after collapsing in the broadcast booth before the Phillies’ 9-8 victory over the Nationals in Washington; he was 73.
Today’s Birthdays: Movie director Stanley Donen is 86. Former Sen. Ben Nighthorse Campbell, R-Colo., is 77. Actor Lyle Waggoner is 75. Actor Edward Fox is 73. Playwright Lanford Wilson is 73. Actor Paul Sorvino is 71. Poet Seamus Heaney is 71. Movie-TV composer Bill Conti is 68. Rock musician Jack Casady is 66. Actor Tony Dow is 65. Singer Al Green is 64. Author-journalist Christopher Hitchens is 61. Actor Ron Perlman is 60. Actor William Sadler is 60. Singer Peabo Bryson is 59. Bandleader/rock musician Max Weinberg is 59. Bluegrass singer-musician Sam Bush is 58. Rock musician Jimmy Destri is 56. Singer-musician Louis Johnson (The Brothers Johnson) is 55. Comedian Gary Kroeger is 53. Actress Saundra Santiago is 53. Sen. Bob Casey Jr., D-Pa., is 50. Rock musician Joey Mazzola (Sponge) is 49. Chess grandmaster Garry Kasparov is 47. Actress Page Hannah is 46. Actress-comedian Caroline Rhea is 46. Rock musician Lisa Umbarger is 45. Rock musician Marc Ford is 44. Reggae singer Capleton is 43. Actor Ricky Schroder is 40. Rock singer Aaron Lewis (Staind) is 38. Actor Bokeem Woodbine is 37. Singer Lou Bega is 35. Actor-producer Glenn Howerton is 34. Basketball player Baron Davis is 31. Actress Courtney Peldon is 29. Pop singer Nellie McKay is 28.
Born This Date:
British anti-government conspirator Guy Fawkes (1570); Frank Woolworth, founder of the five-and-dime stores (1852); outlaw Butch Cassidy (1866); Alfred Butts, inventor of "Scrabble" (1899); Irish playwright Samuel Beckett (1906); Harold Stassen, former Minnesota governor who unsuccessfully sought the Republican presidential nomination seven times (1907); author Eudora Welty (1909); actor/singer Howard Keel and atheist Madalyn Murray O'Hair (both 1919); actor Don Adams (1923).
13 April In Entertainment
In 1964, the movie "Tom Jones" won the best picture and best director Academy Awards. Sidney Poitier became the first black performer in a leading role to win an Oscar, for his work in the movie "Lilies of the Field."
In 1965, the Song of the Year Grammy Award went to "Hello, Dolly." The Beatles captured the best new artist award and won the best group performance award for "A Hard Day's Night."
In 1967, The Rolling Stones played their first concert behind the Iron Curtain, in Warsaw, Poland. Riot police had to step in to deal with 2,000 people who weren't able to get tickets.
In 1971, The Rolling Stones released "Brown Sugar," the first record on their own label, Rolling Stone Records.
In 1979, singer David Lee Roth of Van Halen collapsed onstage in Spokane, Washington, due to exhaustion. [Spokane can take it out of you. — Ed.]
In 1989, entertainer Jack Jones received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. He's probably best known for singing the "Love Boat" theme. [Telly Savalas's favorite crooner. — Ed.]
In 2000, Metallica sued the online song-swapping service Napster for copyright infringement.
In 2009, music producer Phil Spector was found guilty of second-degree murder in the death of actress Lana Clarkson in 2003. It was his second trial. His first ended in mistrial. He was later sentenced to 19 years to life in prison.
Thought for Today: “Go on failing. Go on. Only next time, try to fail better.” — Samuel Beckett, Irish playwright and author born this date in 1906, died in 1989.

Monday, April 12, 2010

What The Hell Is Wrong W/ Republicans?

Mostly because it doesn't appear to be available w/o registration (But we went ahead & registered. What do we care?) the proverbial good parts of a Clive Crook column. Nice image too.
Addressing the Southern Republican Leadership Conference last week, Newt Gingrich, former Speaker of the House of Representatives and a possible presidential contender in 2012, called Barack Obama the most radical president in US history and assailed his administration as a “secular, socialist machine”. Something is seriously amiss with an opposition that regards this as a proper line of attack.

Meetings such as this are not campaign events aimed at voters at large. They are gatherings of activists, intent on maximum fervour. Even so, to call the Obama administration “socialist” is risible. If anything, “secular” makes even less sense. Do Republicans regard universal health insurance as a godless undertaking? And since when, even in the US*, was “secular” an allowable term of abuse?

A moderate and intelligent opposition to the Democrats’ policies is badly needed. Apparently, nobody in the Republican party aims to provide it. Republican leaders seem intent on presenting the party’s angriest, most stupid and least tolerant face.
Problem solved: Reduce the party to just that one face.
Disenchantment with Mr Obama and the Democrats is especially pronounced in the political centre. (Conservatives, of course, were dismayed before the evidence was even in.) You might have thought this would commend a centrist platform to the Republican party approaching November’s mid-term elections. Swing voters decide who wins, and they were up for grabs. Why are Republicans steering to the right?

For several reasons. One is that many Republicans are furious and in no mood for compromise. Another is the emergence of the Tea Party movement – a populist small-government insurgency, disorderly but remarkably energetic. Somehow, the Republicans must harness this new force, or risk being split. Most important, though, is the fact that centrist voters are not yet demanding better solutions of the opposition. Come November, it seems they will settle for punishing the Democrats. The Republicans are moving right, and the centre – for now at least – is not objecting.
Yeah, blah, buncha centrist hooey. What does "the centre – for now at least – is not objecting" mean? That the mugwumps are marching along to "NO!"where, or that the Grand Old Party of "NO!" is leaving these probably imaginary David Broders behind in their stampede to extreme purity?
In a new Gallup poll, Americans’ favourable rating of the Democrats has dropped to 41 per cent, the lowest in this measure’s 18-year history. At the beginning of 2009, Democrats had a 55-34 point lead. Now the parties are tied. Most election pundits are predicting heavy Democratic losses. There is a good chance that control of the House will switch. In narrow electoral terms, the Republicans’ militant posture is working. This dynamic has disturbing implications. A populist-right Republican party is not a party of fiscal conservatives. It is a party of tax-cutters and middle-class entitlement protectors – budget deficits be damned. A populist-right Republican party has no trouble calling for lower taxes, opposing cuts in Medicare (the programme that poses the greatest fiscal danger), and deploring public borrowing, all at the same time. This, in fact, has been its line on healthcare reform.

That reform, with its $1,000bn of extra costs over 10 years, is now law. Democrats may flinch, like Republicans, at cutting Medicare to pay for it, but they have no strong objection to raising taxes once that becomes inescapable. A Republican-controlled House would have strong objections. It might very well refuse to do it, preferring possible fiscal catastrophe to higher taxes.
By the way, that large & unmentioned object you keep bumping into is military-industrial spending.
The Democratic party, for all its faults, is a broad coalition. There is such a thing as a conservative Democrat. Ideologically, the Republican party is shrinking even as it gains popular support. The parties used to overlap in the middle. That is the part of the political spectrum where trade-offs can be admitted, where balances between what voters want and are willing to pay for can be struck, and where fiscal conservatives usually live.
More centrism, though we suppose it should work about as described, & maybe used to when we were young. There must be a formula for how shrunken ideology can get before the return in popular support goes away too.

*Naff off, you sod.

Continuing The "Vote 'Em Out" Theme

Some politicians have to be voted out. Others up & quit the moment things get tough.
Photo via Slate, from an item advertised as Other Playground Metaphors Sarah Palin Can Use To Mock Obama's Policies.

Counting Chickens

Hey, looky here y'all. We was a-wondrin' when one of them ee-lee-tiss w/ typin' skills would git-'er-done w/ reference to the conflicting narratives of  astounding GOP triumph if & when November arrives, assuming, mind you, that party members — the GOP now, sez The NYT, composed of "establishment Republicans, the Tea Party and other ordinary voters, who may share the same frustrations but be turned off from aligning with any of the movements within the party" — & hangers-on don't light the big tent on fire & pull it down on themselves.

Our Boredom Threshold Disorder prevents us from reading closely enough to point out the qualifications, false equivalences & balanced objectivity inherent in the form; we did manage to find these amusing paragraphs:
At a cocktail reception on the banks of the Mississippi River, people in yellow Tea Party shirts barely mingled with Republican stalwarts, many of whom wore neckties or broaches decorated with elephants, the proud symbol of the party. In the exhibition gallery, where T-shirts, books and knickknacks were on sale, “Vote Republican” buttons sat alongside “All government is the problem” bumper stickers.

In the ballroom of the downtown Hilton Hotel, during three days of speeches, applause erupted at every mention of the Tea Party. People in the crowd delivered a standing ovation when a woman took the microphone during a question-and-answer session and denounced party leaders in Washington for siding with moderate incumbents over strict conservatives.

“We are looking for somebody who is strong enough to stand up for what they believe in and not just to kowtow to the Republican Party,” said Sherry Raziano, a nurse who has only recently become politically active and who traveled here from Gulfport, Miss.
Ha ha, Sherry. (Any "Brandis" in your family?) Can't fool us. We know why you "only recently become politically active."
“We as a party need to welcome the people who want to get rid of the folks who are in office now,” Mr. Barbour said. “We need to make them feel welcome. We need to give them a chance to participate.”
Yes, let a thousand flowers bloom, you fat redneck. Nominate & elect every deluded, paranoid loon you can. See how angry you'll make the leftists. It'll be worth the GOP-destroying defeat in 2012, won't it?

Early Afternoon Drooling Teatard Quotes

Oh, thank goodness. Tea Partiers make a firm stand against racist rhetoric.
Rockford, IL tea party organizer David Hale, told the Chicago Tribune "he does not want to stifle the movement's individual nature but' would challenge participants who call [President] Obama a 'Nazi' or use any racial slurs." (When asked by the Tribune what he thinks of Obama, Hale called him "a pure socialist and on the verge of communism.")

And we're very impressed that Mr. Hale can differentiate between Nazis & "socialists on the verge of communism." That sort of awareness is somewhat lacking in the movement.

A different ninny tells us this:
"There's a lot of pent up hostility," McClellan said. "The tea parties have always been peaceful, until the health care bill got passed. That was a whole year before anything happened."

Now someone admits something "happened." Of course, the passage of a bill is as good a justification as any for releasing pent-up hostility.
He said he expects more people to turn out at the April 15 protests around the country than ever before. Despite all the changes to rhetoric and self-awareness, McClellan said the core beliefs of the tea party haven't changed.

"It's a pretty simple concept," he told me. "The people we elect to office should listen to us."

The corollary to McClellan's theory of government is that if your candidate isn't elected, then whoever won has no obligation to listen to you, loser. Why do those who remember nothing from high school civics make the most noise about politics? Has it ever occurred to these ignoramuses that if they want their precious voices of reaction & repression to be heard, they might want to start w/ public financing of electoral campaigns? Of course not: They're reactionaries. As such, they are incapable of finding new solutions. Standing athwart history screeching hysterically is all they can handle.

And, more Tea Partying Fools open their cakeholes.

America's Team

Yesterday's News This Morning

  1. After 21 Deaths, Thai Protesters Say Time for Talk Is Over
    A day after clashes with security forces killed 21 people, Thai "red shirt" protesters say they have no interest in negotiating with the government.
    Read original story in The Associated Press | Sunday, April 11, 2010
  2. Anti-Semitic Incidents in Europe Hit Record
    After Israel's incursion into Gaza, there were 1,129 incidents in 2009, compared to 559 in 2008.
    Read original story in Haaretz | Sunday, April 11, 2010
  3. Cable Links Kissinger to Condor Killings
    A newly declassified document shows that when Henry Kissinger was secretary of state, he tracked back on a planned warning to South American dictators not to carry out an international assassination program.
    Read original story in Los Angeles Times | Sunday, April 11, 2010
  4. Campaign Launched To Arrest Pope During U.K. Visit
    Two renown atheists, including Slate columnist Christopher Hitchens, have asked lawyers to produce a case that would allow the pope to be arrested "for crimes against humanity."
    Read original story in The Times (of London) | Sunday, April 11, 2010
  5. Seven Shot Near the French Quarter in New Orleans
    The shooter escaped into the crowd, leaving many to worry that the violence could have a negative impact on area tourism.
    Read original story in USA Today | Monday, April 12, 2010
  6. Magnitude 6.2 Earthquake Hits Granada, Spain
    With the center of the earthquake approximately 400 miles underground, little damage is anticipated.
    Read original story in CNN | Monday, April 12, 2010

Early Morning Drooling Teatard Quotes

“We need to purge the Republicans of the weaklings,” Tea Party Express 3 Chairman Mark Williams told CNN. “And we’re on a ... RINO hunt. And we’re going to drive them to extinction.”
Remind us, which is the party of death? Party of suicide, really. Juvenile & morbid, & not in a good way.
 He added, “The Democrats at least stand there and tell me they hate me, and tell me that they hate America. These Republicans smile at me, shake my hand and then they stab me in the back.”


The movement also advocates the defeat of Democrats. Tea Party activists hope to purge “the Democrats of the Marxists,” Williams said.
Any November result short of Republican super-majorities in both chambers will be proof positive that America is completely in the grip of Un-Americans, & another reason for patriots to begin cleaning their guns. Can't wait. Nor can we wait for next Monday's 5,000 people w/ 1,000,000 guns March on Washington.

We Aren't Looking For These, But We're Not Passing Up Any We Find

At Last Someone Takes Offense

Ring Nuts & Light Sabers

Our own Chicago-owned L. A. Times offers something called Hero Complex where comic book movies are dissected. We have plenty on our reading list, although that's not the only reason we never bother. However, being pulp-oriented & purchasing the hard-copy fish-wrap version as we do, when we were greeted by this surly bastard, sporting what appear to be quilted pajamas, on the first page of Arts & Books yesterday, we figured we should make some mention of it.
And a mention is all there will be. We'll cynically note that someone must be paying someone else to pimp Ring Festival LA. And we'll quote someone on why they hope this approach may work w/ "geeks."
Russell, whose recent credits include "Hellboy" and "Coraline," penned his own comic-book version of the "Ring," a two-volume series published in 2002 by Dark Horse Comics that he considers the most personal project of his career. An opera fan, he has even spoken to gatherings of so-called Ring Nuts, extreme fans of the "Ring" cycle. "It's almost like going to a comic book convention -- you see the same faces," he said.

Los Angeles Opera is producing the complete "Ring" for the first time beginning in May. Although this avant-garde staging isn't for neophytes, its emphasis on spectacle and visual effects (light sabers play an important role) could make it the ideal "Ring" for superhero geeks.
As we type, we don't care enough to condemn the culture, those who cheese up that culture w/ light sabers, Wagner for being an actual anti-Semite, or some fuck whose "most personal project" was repurposed plagiarism. Hey, to hell w/ them all, & their culture.

12 April: First Civil War Of Treacherous Northern Aggression Gets Underway; Catcher's Mask Debuts; FDR, Sugar Ray, Abbie Hoffman Die; Commie First In Space; Bonds Hits 660th

Today is Monday, April 12, the 102nd day of 2010. There are 263 days left in the year.
Today's Highlight in History:
On April 12, 1945, President Franklin D. Roosevelt died of a cerebral hemorrhage in Warm Springs, Ga., at age 63; he was succeeded by Vice President Harry S. Truman.
Other Notable Events On This Date:
In 1606, England's King James I decreed the design of the original Union Flag, which combined the flags of England and Scotland.
In 1861, the American Civil War began as Confederate forces bombarded Fort Sumter in South Carolina.
In 1877, the catcher for Harvard's baseball team, James Tyng, wore a modified fencing mask behind the plate in a game against the Lynn Live Oaks. It is believed to be the first time a catcher's mask was used during a game.
In 1908, fire devastated the city of Chelsea, Mass.
In 1910, American educator and social critic William Graham Sumner died at age 69 in Englewood, N.J.
In 1934, "Tender Is the Night," by F. Scott Fitzgerald, was first published in book form after being serialized in Scribner's Magazine.
In 1955, the Salk vaccine against polio was declared safe and effective.
In 1960, Candlestick Park in San Francisco first opened, with Vice President Richard Nixon throwing the ceremonial first pitch before a game between the San Francisco Giants and St. Louis Cardinals, which the Giants won, 3-1.
In 1961, Soviet cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin became the first man to fly in space, orbiting the earth once before making a safe landing.
In 1981, the space shuttle Columbia blasted off from Cape Canaveral on its first test flight.
In 1983, Harold Washington was elected Chicago's first African-American mayor.
In 1985, Sen. Jake Garn, R-Utah, became the first sitting member of Congress to fly in space as the shuttle Discovery lifted off.
In 1989, former boxing champion Sugar Ray Robinson died in Culver City, Calif., at age 67; radical activist Abbie Hoffman was found dead at his home in New Hope, Pa., at age 52.
In 1990, under pressure from environmentalists, three top U.S. tuna canneries -- Heinz, Van Camp and Bumblebee -- announced "dolphin-safe" tuna-catching practices.
In 1993, NATO warplanes began enforcing a no-fly zone over Bosnia-Herzegovina, marking the first time the alliance's forces were used outside its traditional defense area.
In 1994, Israel and the PLO agreed that 9,000 Palestinian police would be stationed in Jericho and the Gaza Strip after the Israeli military withdrawal.
In 1999, U.S. District Judge Susan Webber Wright found President Bill Clinton in contempt of court for giving "intentionally false" testimony in a lawsuit filed by Paula Jones about his relationship with former White House intern Monica Lewinsky. Clinton was fined $1,202. A jury in Little Rock, Ark., acquitted Susan McDougal of obstructing Independent Counsel Kenneth Starr's Whitewater inquiry and deadlocked on two other charges, causing a mistrial.
In 2000, Attorney General Janet Reno met in Miami with the U.S. relatives of Elian Gonzalez, after which she ordered them to bring the 6-year-old boy to an airport the next day so he could be taken to a reunion with his father in Washington. Elian was seized by federal agents ten days after Reno's order to turn him over.
In 2002, Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez resigned under pressure from the country's divided military. (He was returned to office two days later.)
In 2003, Gen. Amir al-Saadi, Saddam Hussein's top science adviser, denied Iraq had any weapons of mass destruction and surrendered to U.S. forces.
In 2004, a federal judge allowed a nationwide ban on dietary supplements containing ephedra to take effect, turning aside a plea from two manufacturers. Abelardo Flores and Fatima Holloway pleaded guilty in Houston to taking part in a smuggling scheme that resulted in the deaths of 19 illegal immigrants abandoned in a sweltering truck trailer. Iraqi insurgents released 12 hostages of different nationalities in response to pleas by Sunni Muslim clerics. Barry Bonds hit his 660th home run to tie his godfather, Willie Mays, for third on baseball's career list. (Bonds is now the career leader in home runs.)
In 2005, three men with suspected al-Qaida ties, already in British custody, were charged with a yearslong plot to attack the New York Stock Exchange and other East Coast financial institutions. Seven men were eventually convicted in British court and received sentences ranging up to 26 years; the leader of the group, Dhiren Barot, pleaded guilty to conspiracy to commit murder and received life in prison. President George W. Bush visited soldiers at Fort Hood, Texas, marking the two-year anniversary of the end of Saddam Hussein's regime. U.S. Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld made a surprise visit to Iraq and urged the quick formation of a new government.
In 2006, the French Parliament voted to replace a controversial labor law that triggered nationwide rioting among youth who feared unjustified dismissals.
In 2007, Kurt Vonnegut Jr., whose novels such as "Slaughterhouse-Five" resonated with a generation, died in New York at the age of 84.
In 2008, Democrat Barack Obama conceded that comments he'd made privately during a fundraiser about bitter working class voters who "cling to guns or religion" were ill chosen. Boston College won the NCAA hockey championship, 4-1, over Notre Dame. The United States won its second women's world hockey championship, upsetting Canada 4-3 in Harbin, China. At least 13 suspected militia gunmen were killed in Sadr City as fighting raged between Iraqi government forces and the Mehdi Army.
In 2009, American cargo ship captain Richard Phillips was rescued from Somali pirates by U.S. Navy snipers who shot and killed three of the hostage-takers. Angel Cabrera became the first Argentine to win the Masters. In Hameenlinna, Finland, the United States won its second straight women's World Hockey Championship title, beating Canada 4-1.
Today's Birthdays: Country singer Ned Miller is 85. Actress Jane Withers is 84. Opera singer Montserrat Caballe is 77. Actor Charles Napier is 74. Playwright Alan Ayckbourn is 71. Jazz musician Herbie Hancock is 70. Actor Frank Bank ("Leave It to Beaver") is 68. Rock singer John Kay (Steppenwolf) is 66. Actor Ed O'Neill is 64. Author Tom Clancy is 63. Actor Dan Lauria is 63. Talk show host David Letterman is 63. Author Scott Turow is 61. Singer David Cassidy is 60. Actor-playwright Tom Noonan is 59. Rhythm-and-blues singer JD Nicholas (The Commodores) is 58. Singer Pat Travers is 56. Actor Andy Garcia is 54. Movie director Walter Salles is 54. Country singer Vince Gill is 53. Actress Suzzanne (cq) Douglas is 53. Rock musician Will Sergeant (Echo & the Bunnymen) is 52. Rock singer Art Alexakis (Everclear) is 48. Country singer Deryl Dodd is 46. Folk-pop singer Amy Ray (Indigo Girls) is 46. Actress Alicia Coppola is 42. Rock singer Nicholas Hexum (311) is 40. Actor Nicholas Brendon is 39. Actress Shannen Doherty is 39. Actress Marley Shelton is 36. Actress Jordana Spiro is 33. Rock musician Guy Berryman (Coldplay) is 32. Actress Claire Danes is 31. Actress Jennifer Morrison is 31. Contemporary Christian musician Joe Rickard (Red) is 23. Rock singer-musician Brendon Urie (Panic at the Disco) is 23. Actress Saoirse Ronan ("Atonement") is 16.
Also: American statesman Henry Clay (1777); opera singer Lily Pons (1898)
actress/dancer Ann Miller (1923) & singer Tiny Tim (1932).
12 April In Entertainment
In 1935, "Your Hit Parade" premiered.
In 1954, Bill Haley and His Comets recorded "Rock Around The Clock" for Decca Records. It's considered the first rock and roll song to top the charts.
In 1966, Jan Berry of the duo Jan and Dean crashed his Corvette into a parked truck in Los Angeles. He suffered extensive brain damage and paralysis and needed several years of rehabilitation.
In 1979, Mickey Thomas became the lead singer of Jefferson Starship.
In 1989, Herbert Mills of The Mills Brothers died in Las Vegas at age 77. The group was probably best known for the song "Paper Doll."
In 1992, the Euro Disneyland theme park opened in France.
In 1993, actress Lisa Bonet filed for divorce from singer Lenny Kravitz.
In 1997, The Fugees played the first of two homecoming concerts in Haiti to raise money for Haitian refugees. The concerts ended up costing more money than they raised.
In 2009, actress Marilyn Chambers, 56, who'd starred in the explicit 1972 movie "Behind the Green Door," was found dead at her home in Canyon Country, Calif.
Thought for Today: "All history is only one long story to this effect: Men have struggled for power over their fellow men in order that they might win the joys of earth at the expense of others, and might shift the burdens of life from their own shoulders upon those of others." — William Graham Sumner (1840-1910).

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Tee Vee Ear

At The Masters (Technically, on the See Bee Ess coverage thereof): What the fuck-tuck-tucking hell is it w/ the gawd-awful pseudo-funereal piano, strings, muted horns & other noise played underneath the hushed & solemn announcers?

Is the soul (term used loosely) of the country-club belonging, greens fee-paying successful American businessman this numb? Do the sexist, racist crackers at Augusta National insist on it as part of the broadcast deal?

The real question is why we stopped when surfing past. Don't we know any better?

Untitled (Uras #11)

11 April: William, Mary Take Over Limeys; Napoleon Pulls A Palin, Except He Goes Into Exile; Iowa Taxes Butts; Truman Axes Mac; Lucky 13 Lifts Off; "Mary Hartman" Is 71

Today is Sunday, April 11, the 101st day of 2010. There are 264 days left in the year.
Today's Highlight in History:
On April 11, 1970, Apollo 13, with astronauts James A. Lovell, Fred W. Haise and Jack Swigert, blasted off on its ill-fated mission to the moon. (Although the spacecraft was crippled when an oxygen tank ruptured in mid-flight, the crew managed to return safely.)
On this date:
In 1689, William III and Mary II were crowned as joint sovereigns of Britain.
In 1814, Napoleon Bonaparte abdicated as Emperor of the French and was banished to the island of Elba.
In 1898, as tensions with Spain continued to rise, President William McKinley asked Congress to authorize military intervention in Cuba.
In 1899, the treaty ending the Spanish-American War was declared in effect.
In 1921, Iowa became the first state to impose a cigarette tax, at 2 cents a package.
In 1945, American soldiers liberated the notorious Nazi concentration camp Buchenwald in Germany.
In 1951, President Harry S. Truman relieved General Douglas MacArthur of his commands in the Far East.
In 1968, one week after the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr., U.S. President Lyndon Johnson signed into law the Civil Rights Act of 1968.
In 1979, Idi Amin was deposed as president of Uganda as rebels and exiles backed by Tanzanian forces seized control. Sound Bite: AP correspondent Serge Schmemann
In 1980, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission issued regulations specifically prohibiting sexual harassment of workers by supervisors.
In 1983, Harold Washington was elected the first black mayor of Chicago.
In 1987, South Africa, extending a 9-month-old state of emergency, barred all protests on behalf of political detainees.
In 1988, the hijackers of a Kuwait Airways jetliner killed a second hostage, dumping his body onto the ground in Larnaca, Cyprus.
In 1989, Mexican officials began unearthing the remains of victims of a drug-trafficking cult near Matamoros; one of the dead was University of Texas student Mark Kilroy, who had disappeared while on spring break. (Several cult members were later convicted of premeditated murder and sentenced to 50 years in prison.)
In 1993, nine inmates and one guard were killed when an 11-day riot erupted at the maximum-security Southern Ohio Correctional Facility near Lucasville.
In 1996, Israel retaliated for bomb attacks by shelling Hezbollah positions in Lebanon. A U.N. refugee camp was struck, killing more than 100 civilians. Also in 1996, 7-year-old pilot Jessica Dubroff, her father and her flight instructor were killed when their plane crashed on takeoff from Cheyenne, Wyo.
In 1999, the Justice Department reported that more than a third of the women in state prisons and jails said they were physically or sexually abused as children. Jose Maria Olazabal won the Masters by two shots over Davis Love III.
In 2000, Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Barak met with President Bill Clinton at the White House in what a senior U.S. official described as a good, productive, serious discussion. A British judge branded historian David Irving an anti-Semite racist and an apologist for Adolf Hitler, ruling that an American scholar was justified in calling him a Holocaust denier.
In 2001, ending a tense 11-day standoff, China agreed to free the 24 crew members of an American spy plane.
In 2002, U.S. Rep. James A. Traficant Jr., D-Ohio, was convicted of taking bribes and kickbacks from businessmen and his own staff.
In 2003, American troops took the northern Iraqi city of Mosul without a fight.
In 2004, President George W. Bush defended his response to a briefing memo from August 2001 about possible terrorist plots against the United States, saying he was "satisfied that some of the matters were being looked into" and that there were no specific threats against New York and Washington. Pope John Paul II celebrated Easter Mass with calls for world leaders to resolve conflicts in Iraq, the Holy Land and Africa. Phil Mickelson's agonizing pursuit of a major ended at the Masters when he made an 18-foot birdie putt on the final hole.
In 2005, during a meeting at his Texas ranch, President George W. Bush told Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon he could not allow further West Bank settlement growth and said Israeli and Palestinian doubts about each other were hampering peace prospects. Jeffrey Ake, a 47-year-old contract worker from LaPorte, Ind., was abducted in Iraq. (His fate remains unknown.) Miss North Carolina Chelsea Cooley was crowned Miss USA at the pageant in Baltimore.
In 2006, Iran announced that it had enriched uranium on a small scale for the first time. Israel's Cabinet declared Prime Minister Ariel Sharon permanently incapacitated. Also in 2006, more than 1 million U.S. immigrants and their supporters in some 150 cities across the nation rallied peacefully against a congressional clampdown and possible deportations. And, the leader of the Sicilian Mafia, Bernardo Provenzano, was arrested near Palermo, Italy, after eluding capture for 43 years.
In 2007, charges were dropped against three former Duke University lacrosse players who were falsely accused of rape. Author Kurt Vonnegut died at age 84.
In 2008, Group of Seven financial officials meeting in Washington pledged to strengthen their regulation of banks and other financial institutions while anxiously hoping the credit crisis in the United States would be a short one. French troops captured six pirates after the pirates released 30 hostages who were aboard the French luxury yacht Le Ponant when it was seized off Somalia's coast. Examination of Iran's most recent missile launch indicated the nation is developing both long-range missile technology and a space center, Jane's Information Group said.
In 2009, a 16-nation Asian summit in Bangkok, Thailand was canceled after demonstrators stormed the venue. Another demonstration by the same group a few days later in Bangkok led to violent clashes with the military. Boston University won its fifth NCAA hockey championship, defeating Miami (Ohio) 4-3 in overtime.
Today's Birthdays: Former New York Gov. Hugh Carey is 91. Ethel Kennedy is 82. Actor Johnny Sheffield is 79. Actor Joel Grey is 78. Actress Louise Lasser is 71. Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist Ellen Goodman is 69. Movie writer-director John Milius is 66. Actor Peter Riegert is 63. Actor Meshach Taylor is 63. Movie director Carl Franklin is 61. Actor Bill Irwin is 60. Country singer-songwriter Jim Lauderdale is 53. Songwriter-producer Daryl Simmons is 53. Rock musician Nigel Pulsford is 49. Actor Lucky Vanous is 49. Country singer Steve Azar is 46. Singer Lisa Stansfield is 44. Rock musician Dylan Keefe (Marcy Playground) is 40. Actor Johnny Messner is 40. Actor Vicellous Shannon is 39. Rapper David Banner is 36. Actress Tricia Helfer is 36. Rock musician Chris Gaylor (The All-American Rejects) is 31. Actress Kelli Garner is 26. Singer Joss Stone is 23.
Even The Dead Have Birthdays, Today's Including: American statesman and orator Edward Everett (1794); baseball Hall of Fame member Cap Anson (1852); U.S. Supreme Court Justice Charles Evans Hughes (1862); statesman Dean Acheson, secretary of state under President Harry Truman (1893) & fashion designer Oleg Cassini (1913).
11 April In Entertainment
In 1958, Jerry Lee Lewis' first wife, Jane Mitcham, filed for divorce. Lewis had already secretly married his 13-year-old cousin, Myra Gale Brown. [Better late than never. —  Ed.]
In 1961, Bob Dylan made his first professional appearance at a club in New York's Greenwich Village.
In 1965, The Beatles and The Rolling Stones shared the bill at the "New Musical Express" poll winners' contest in London.
In 1970, Paul McCartney announced what he called a temporary break from The Beatles. Peter Green of Fleetwood Mac announced he was leaving the band to follow his religious beliefs.
In 1981, guitarist Eddie Van Halen and actress Valerie Bertinelli got married. They separated in 2002 and divorced in 2007.
In 1983, "Gandhi" was the big winner at the Academy Awards, taking best picture and director. "Up Where We Belong" from the movie "An Officer and a Gentleman" won the best song award.
In 1988, "The Last Emperor" was named best picture at the Academy Awards. Cher won a best actress award for "Moonstruck."
Thought for Today: "I'd rather be strongly wrong than weakly right." — Tallulah Bankhead, American actress (1903-1968).
The UPI Thought For The Day: It was Jerry Seinfeld who said, "A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking." [What about libraries, Philistine? — Ed.]

Saturday, April 10, 2010

C'mon, Tea Partiers! Are You Ready To Do It, Thai-Stylee?

Saturday Afternoon, "Raw," but assembled:Saturday Night, Edited & Narrated:

Forever 49

Well, two out of three isn't bad for first on similarly-themed items. Celebrated a friend's birthday last night, w/ the assistance of a mere three snoots of bourbon, an ale & a Tecate &, despite binging w/ a full meal in our gut & not touching a drop after midnight, we are feeling the effects, even after a reasonable amount of sleep. The old get old, & stay that way.

And yes, this may be reflected in some way by the nature, if not quality, of the items cranked out today.

Annals Of Orchestral Arrangement: "Flower Power Sucks!"

From Cogitamus.

Comic Furry Sex

No, it's NOT funny!

Several Hrs. Later: Also.

Annals Of Comedy Relief

The Great Orange Satan recaps his first quarter hate mail. One can not help but laugh & laugh. (And then laugh some more.)

Until one remembers that many of the "typists" responsible for this sort of thing are still allowed to vote. Well, once the camps that many of them fear are accepting "guests" we won't have to worry about that, will we, fellow CommuNazis?

Uh-Oh. Think This Could Be Trouble?

No Survivors in Flight Carrying Polish President, Russian Media Report
MOSCOW -- A plane carrying the Polish president, Lech Kaczynski, and his wife crashed in western Russia on Saturday morning, and there were no survivors, according to Russia media.

A spokeswoman for the emergency situations ministry said on Russian television that the plane, a Tupolev 154, crashed as it was landing in Smolensk, and 87 people on board had died.
From the leader in breaking news delivered to our in-box, The New York Times.

Also note: Beat Mr. M. by two — count 'em! — two minutes. Hah!

10 April: 100th Day of The (Non-Leap) Yr.; Jackie Robinson Signed; Thresher Sinks

Today is Saturday, April 10, the 100th day of 2010. There are 265 days left in the year.Today's Highlight in History:
On April 10, 1912, the RMS Titanic set sail from Southampton, England, on its ill-fated maiden voyage.
On this date:
In 1790, President George Washington signed into law the first United States Patent Act. Merchant Robert Gray docked at Boston Harbor, becoming the first American to circumnavigate the globe. He sailed from Boston in September 1787.
In 1849, William Hunt of New York patented the safety pin.
In 1864, Austrian Archduke Maximilian became emperor of Mexico.
In 1866, the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals was incorporated.
In 1916, the Professional Golfers Association of America was founded.
In 1919, Emiliano Zapata, a leader of peasants and indigenous people during the Mexican Revolution, was ambushed and killed in Morelos by government forces.
In 1925, the novel "The Great Gatsby," by F. Scott Fitzgerald, was first published, by Scribner's of New York.
In 1932, German president Paul Von Hindenburg was re-elected in a runoff, with Adolf Hitler coming in second.
In 1942, Japanese soldiers herded U.S. and Filipino prisoners of war on Bataan in the Philippines and forced them to march to another camp. During the six-day "Death March," more than 5,200 Americans and many more Filipinos died.
In 1947, Brooklyn Dodgers president Branch Rickey announced he had purchased the contract of Jackie Robinson from the Montreal Royals, paving the way for Robinson to become the first black player in the major leagues.
In 1957, Egypt reopened the Suez Canal to all shipping traffic. (The canal had been closed due to wreckage resulting from the Suez Crisis.)
In 1959, the future emperor of Japan, Crown Prince Akihito, married a commoner, Michiko Shoda.
In 1963, the nuclear-powered submarine USS Thresher sank during deep-diving tests off Cape Cod, Mass., in a disaster that claimed 129 lives.
In 1971, the U.S. table tennis team arrived in China, the first U.S. group to penetrate the so-called Bamboo Curtain since the 1950s.
In 1972, the United States and the Soviet Union joined some 70 nations in signing an agreement banning biological warfare.
In 1978, Arkady Shevchenko, a high-ranking Soviet citizen employed by the United Nations, sought political asylum in the United States.
In 1981, imprisoned IRA hunger striker Bobby Sands won election to the British Parliament.
In 1991, an Italian ferry headed to Sardinia collided with an oil tanker near Leghorn, Italy, killing 151 passengers and crew. The tanker crew survived.
In 1992, financier Charles Keating Jr. was sentenced in Los Angeles to nine years in prison for swindling investors when his Lincoln Savings and Loan collapsed. (The convictions were later overturned). Also in 1992, in a formal Gulf War report, the Pentagon said allied bombers destroyed more Iraqi electrical generating facilities than necessary, causing undue postwar hardship on civilians.
In 1994, two U.S aircraft bombed a Serbian command post in Bosnia. It was the first NATO air attack against ground forces.
In 1996, President Bill Clinton vetoed a bill that would have outlawed a technique that opponents call partial-birth abortion.
In 1997, a U.S. judge in Washington ruled the Line-Item Veto Act of 1996 was unconstitutional.
In 1998, the Northern Ireland peace talks concluded as negotiators reached a landmark settlement to end 30 years of bitter rivalries and bloody attacks. Also in 1998, the anti-impotence drug Viagra went on the market and became one of the best-selling new medications of all time.
In 1999, bad weather hampered NATO's bombing campaign against Yugoslavia, but the allies warned Slobodan Milosevic the lull wouldn't last. The Pentagon, meanwhile, announced that 82 U.S. planes would join the force conducting airstrikes over Yugoslavia. The Miami Heat humiliated the Chicago Bulls, 82-49, holding the Bulls to the lowest point total since the introduction of the shot clock.
In 2000, The Washington Post won three Pulitzer Prizes, including the public service award for the second year in a row; The Wall Street Journal took two honors, and The Associated Press won for investigative reporting on the killing of Korean civilians by U.S. troops at the start of the Korean War. South Korea and North Korea announced a June date for their first summit since the peninsula was divided in 1945. The Nasdaq plunged 258 points in its second-biggest drop, starting the dramatic fall-off in the value of technology stocks.
In 2001, the Netherlands legalized mercy killings and assisted suicide for patients with unbearable, terminal illness.
In 2004, the White House declassified and released a document sent to President George W. Bush before the Sept. 11 attacks which cited recent intelligence of a possible al-Qaida plot to strike inside the United States. The U.S. Board on Geographic Names officially renamed Squaw Peak in Phoenix Piestewa Peak, in honor of Army Spc. Lori Piestewa, who was killed in Iraq in 2003. Marine Cpl. Cesar Laurean, suspected of killing a pregnant colleague, was arrested in Tacambaro, Mexico; Laurean is charged with murder in the death of Marine Lance Cpl. Maria Lauterbach in North Carolina, but is fighting extradition to the U.S.
In 2005, Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon arrived in Texas to meet with President George W. Bush. About 3,000 Israeli police officers were deployed to Jerusalem's Old City to prevent threatened protests by Jewish militants at the Temple Mount, angry at Israel's plan to remove Jewish settlements from Gaza and the West Bank. Tiger Woods won his fourth Masters with a spectacular finish of birdies and bogeys.
In 2006, Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi was narrowly beaten in his bid for another term by former premier Romano Prodi.
In 2007, a woman wearing an explosives vest strapped underneath her black robe blew herself up in the midst of 200 Iraqi police recruits in Muqdadiyah, killing 16. Three former Birmingham, Ala., college students were sentenced to federal prison for setting fire to nine rural southern U.S. churches and ordered to pay $3.1 million in restitution. Also in 2007, four Serbian paramilitary officers were found guilty of taking part in the Srebrenica massacre of Bosnian Muslims 13 years previously. Thousands of men and boys were reported slaughtered in a few days.
In 2008, a Muslim terrorist ring plot to kidnap athletes and visitors during the Summer Olympics in Beijing has been uncovered, Chinese officials said. Thirty-five suspects were arrested. Also in 2008, international observers hailed Nepal's elections as a generally peaceful success despite some violence. Nepal voters decided to end their monarchy and adopt a republic form of government with former Maoist terrorists playing a key role.
In 2009, police in Tracy, Calif. arrested Sunday school teacher Melissa Huckaby in connection with the death of 8-year-old Sandra Cantu, whose body had been found in a suitcase. French Navy commandos stormed a sailboat held by pirates off the Somali coast, freeing four hostages; however, one hostage was killed in the operation. An American captain held by pirates off Somalia as a hostage while his crew escaped remained in captivity after unsuccessfully trying to swim away from his kidnappers. Meanwhile, two U.S. naval vessels were nearby for possible intervention to save Capt. Richard Phillips, whose merchant ship the Maersk Alabama, carrying aid supplies to Kenya, had been attacked by marauders.
Today's Birthdays: Actor Harry Morgan is 95. Actor Max von Sydow is 81. Actress Liz Sheridan is 81. Actor Omar Sharif is 78. Sportscaster John Madden is 74. Rhythm-and-blues singer Bobbie Smith (The Spinners) is 74. Sportscaster Don Meredith is 72. Reggae artist Bunny Wailer is 63. Actor Steven Seagal is 59. Folk-pop singer Terre Roche (The Roches) is 57. Actor Peter MacNicol is 56. Rock musician Steven Gustafson (10,000 Maniacs) is 53. Singer-producer Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds is 52. Rock singer-musician Brian Setzer is 51. Rapper Afrika Bambaataa is 50. Rock singer Katrina Leskanich is 50. Actor Jeb Adams is 49. Olympic gold medal speedskater Cathy Turner is 48. Rock musician Tim "Herb" Alexander is 45. Actor-comedian Orlando Jones is 42. Rock musician Mike Mushok (Staind) is 41. Singer Kenny Lattimore is 40. Rapper Q-Tip (AKA Kamaal) is 40. Blues singer Shemekia Copeland is 31. Actress Laura Bell Bundy is 29. Actress Chyler Leigh is 28. Actor Ryan Merriman is 27. Singer Mandy Moore is 26.
Also Born On This Date, But Not Very Lively: Signer of the U.S. Declaration of Independence Button Gwinnett (1735); U.S. Navy Adm. Matthew Perry, who concluded the first treaty between Japan and the United States (1794); soldier, diplomat and novelist Lewis Wallace, author of "Ben-Hur" (1827); William Booth, founder of the Salvation Army (1829); journalist and publisher Joseph Pulitzer (1847); Frances Perkins, the first female U.S. Cabinet member, Secretary of Labor) (1882); journalist and diplomat Clare Boothe Luce (1903); actor Chuck Connors (1921): & writer David Halberstam (1934).
10 April In Entertainment
In 1953, the first feature-length 3D horror movie in color, "House of Wax," premiered in New York. Vincent Price starred.
In 1956, singer Nat "King" Cole was beaten up by a group of racial segregationists in Birmingham, Alabama.
In 1957, Ricky Nelson sang for the first time on "The Adventures of Ozzy and Harriet." He performed "I'm Walkin'."
In 1962, former Beatles member Stu Sutcliffe died of a brain hemorrhage in Hamburg, Germany. He was 22.
In 1967, "A Man for All Seasons" won most of the major awards at the Oscars. Elizabeth Taylor won the best actress award for "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?"
In 1968, "In The Heat Of The Night" was named best picture at the Academy Awards. Also in 1968, drummer Mickey Hart joined the Grateful Dead.
In 1972, "The French Connection" won the best picture and best director at the Academy Awards. Gene Hackman was named best actor for his role in that film. The best original song award went to the "Theme From 'Shaft.'"
In 1989, Alabama was named artist of the decade by the Academy of Country Music.
In 1991, Natalie Schafer, the actress who played Mrs. Howell on "Gilligan's Island," died of cancer. She was 90.
In 1992, comedian Sam Kinison was killed when a pickup truck hit his car on a California highway. The 17-year-old driver was arrested.
In 1994, Charles Kuralt hosted his last episode of "Sunday Morning" on CBS. Charles Osgood was his replacement.
In 2000, actor Larry Linville, one of the stars of the situation comedy "M★A★S★H," died in New York at age 60.
In 2001, rapper Eminem was given two years probation on a weapons charge. He was arrested the previous June for allegedly using a gun to hit a man kissing his wife. Also in 2001, Kevin Olmstead of Ann Arbor, Michigan, won $2,180,000 on "Who Wants to Be A Millionaire." It's the largest prize ever given out on a TV game show.
Thought for Today: "What is more unwise than to mistake uncertainty for certainty, falsehood for truth?" — Cicero, Roman orator, statesman and philosopher (106-43 B.C.)

Friday, April 9, 2010

That Was Fun

After waxing ecstatic (for us) over FREE DirecTV several items below, we should have expected trouble.

The DirecTV signal from the roof antenna is piggy-backed through the already-there TimeWarnerCable wiring. This worked fine for about four hrs. after the DirecTV installation, then: Tiling & inability to tune some channels from the TWC box. Very lucky for the DirecTV weasels that the RoadRunner Internet access doesn't appear to have suffered.

Now, having decided it wasn't worth the expense, effort & possible criminal penalties to buy a bolt-cutter & snap the lock on the local DirecTV distributor's box so we can free ourselves from their web of digital interference, we're forced to wait until sometime Monday before we'll be able to watch some of the higher-numbered channels through the cable.

We did not need any further proof that the world is shit.

The Intersection Of Politics & Wrestling

Don't listen to us. The Daily Caller has done some original work, & here's more (We're extra proud of them for keeping their investigations on the kinky side, too.):

WWE diva’s fetish movies make for awkward moments in Linda McMahon’s campaign

By Jonathan Strong - The Daily Caller | Published: 04/09/10 at 2:40 AM | Updated: 04/09/10 at 6:58 AM

Reading her Web site, you might almost forget it was only a few years ago that McMahon, reduced to a near-comatose state by her husband Vince’s public affair with WWE diva Trish Stratus, rose up from her wheelchair on Wrestlemania 17 to kick Vince in the balls.
If we'd seen it we doubt we'd have forgotten.
But unknown until now – even, they say, to her campaign and top WWE officials, are dozens of sexual fetish movies starring a popular WWE diva released over several years the diva was under the employ of McMahon’s WWE.

The titles of these movies include classics like “Bare Breasted Bondage Girls,” “Tied, Gagged and Frightened!,” “Girls Will Chloroform Girls!” and “Dirty Soled Dolls.”

The WWE diva who appeared in those films, Candice Michelle, starred in 58 fetish movies between 2002 and 2006, mostly under the name Mackenzie Montgomery.
Michelle wants you to know that none of these movies are pornography. “I have never, ever done porn in my life,” Michelle told The Daily Caller. “The most I ever did in any of these is topless … You will never see insertion into any orifice of my body or you will never see a penis actually touching any orifice of my body … I guess I feel like I’m a great actor because man you guys really think I did porn for some reason! I must have done something good in those films. It’s not porn at all.”