Sunday, October 24, 2010

Bargain-Bin Breakfast W/ Bouffant
& His Cast-Iron Stomach

We're sick of foodies & their crap, which seems to have started as a reaction to the HIV/AIDS plague, way back in the early '80s: No more concern-less sex, so let's focus on an actual human need & screw it up w/ pretension.

We've also about had it w/ our body imposing its sad desires for oxygen, water, food & humping on us, as most of those activities require physical (or worse) effort. And had it w/ people imposing themselves on us w/ questions & the like. Leave us alone, damnit!

And so we respond to the bourgeoisie & their fethishes. Got some used bacon & Cheese Wursts at the local farmer's market (Some guy named Ralphs runs it.) & set to work.
Saved $0.79 on the Cheddar Wursts, & $3.50 on the bacon!
Buns are Ralphs "Value" brand.
You may wish to nuke the bacon longer than the wursts. We did.
Presentation is everything.
The total package. Orangeade was only $0.88.
If you've been put off your feed by this, our job here is done.

8 comments:

Weldon Berger said...

What kind of questions bother you the most?

M. Bouffant said...

We See What You're Doing There Editor Declares:

Ones from people who expect answers. Soon. In conversation. On their time-scale. The nerve!

Read a short story on line in which the protag was quite the depressive, moaning about the imposition of something or another, & we realized that we essentially look at everything asked of us as an imposition, including the need to breathe & so on.

Praise Jah for autonomic brain function, or we'd be in biiig trouble.

Substance McGravitas said...

Where's the sugar?

M. Bouffant said...

Ate A Mere Three Hrs. Ago & We're Hungry Again, Damnit! Ed Sez:

That ain't nuthin, McG. Relatives in Montana would slather butter on white bread & then cover it w/ granulated white sugar. Then they'd eat it. Raw.

Weldon Berger said...

Lard. Lard is the ultimate food for people who turn to the lizard brain for physical editorial purposes. Pure fat. Cuts the conversion time to zero. Requires very little by way of preparation. Better slightly melted and slathered on bread, but one can always eat it straight out of the can.

Thanks for answering my question. Anything else?

M. Bouffant said...

Nausea Editor [Bent Over/Doubled Up] Types:

OK, we're off our feed now. Thanks.

Glennis said...

Would prefer partaking of such a treat served off a warped and buckled jelly-roll pan heated over a propane tank mounted on a stroller in Winston Alley, thankyewverymuch.

M. Bouffant said...

From The Culinary Copycat Editor:

Some of the residents of our building are just that sort of entrepreneur, & we're far from the toy &/or garment districts.

This was high-grade for high-dollar honkies though; it's doubtful their dogs are Cheddar Wursts.