Sunday, August 16, 2009

Quagmire

Our favorite imperative is "Stop pretending!" Our favorite question is "Why bother?" The two combine well, & what else can one say, when confronted w/ the reality of Afghanistan?Really. A "wife-starving law." And the United Snakes is going to build a stable democracy in this land, never conquered by outside forces, where primary loyalty is still tribal & women are lucky to be treated as chattel? Stop pretending, already.
The U. S. gov't. couldn't win the hearts & minds of the Vietnamese people, & they'd been softened up by a hundred odd yrs. of Frog colonialism to prepare them for the American Empire. The Afghans threw their ancestral enemies the Rooskis out a mere decade & a half ago. Are they scared of America's paper tiger? We think not. (Indeed, we just heard some guy w/ a towel on his head & a beard on his chin say: "Bring it on!")
What do Americans really think they're doing in Afghanistan? They could make it the 51st state & still be no more able to stop Taliban/Al Qaida/Islamic idiot fundamentalism than they were able to catch Eric Rudolph or any number of other survivalist bomber/nutjobs wandering the Great American Outdoors.
A Modest Proposal
One bright idea (And it's ours!) would be to send in the Chickenhawk Crusaders who'd like to, as Ann Coulter so aptly put it, kill their leaders & convert them all to Xianity. (There are several excellent candidates whose views are quite clear on this subject. Let's give them the opportunity to put their lives where their big mouths are.) Win-win situation, really: Both countries set their lunatic fringes at each other, & let the Big Fucking Killer in The Sky recognize his own.
Why this country we're stuck in insists on wasting its finest young people in a futile attempt on the other side of the world when we have excess baggage here chomping at the bit to kill Muslims for Jesus is far beyond us. We've been trying to figure out This Great Nation of Ours™ for some time now, & we're just about to admit defeat.
And "defeat" brings us to the big finale. We'll stop pretending & admit that it would please us no end to see this sad little example of adventurism result in the end of the American Empire. (See: Union, Soviet Socialist.) Especially sweet in that, in true Yankee style, the end would come as the result of a deliberate ignorance of history, prioritizing militarism over the well-being of the nation & yada.
Why fucking bother?