Saturday, September 6, 2008

"It's Over"

Slate's "Today's Papers" brought to our attention today's column from one Peggy Noonan, of the WSJ. Yes, the Peggy Noonan who wrote speeches for Ronald Reagan, & was recently overheard saying "it's over" in reference (she claimed) to Republicans believing that whatever right-wing neo-you-name-it crap they come up w/ will appeal to "middle America." Some thought that wasn't quite what she meant. Her essay indicates that she, at least, swallows it whole.
She took him square on, fearlessly, by which I mean in part that she showed no awkwardness connected to race, or racial history. A small town mayor is kind of like a community organizer only you have actual responsibilities. He wrote two memoirs but never authored a major bill. They've hauled the Styrofoam pillars back to the Hollywood lot.
Gov. Palin isn't awkward about race at all. She's ready to bring it right out there. We all know what "community organizer" means in the world of the Rabid Weasels. It means "niggers being stirred up by outside agitators." It means "Remember George Wallace or whichever cracker Governor brought the phrase 'outside agitators' up." This is red meat, & it will not meet w/ as much disapproval as liberal wusses hope. Another fabulous rumor about Mme. Moosedropping is at a local (we guess) site, LA Progressive. You remember the children's story about Little Black Sambo & The Bitch, don't you? Time, like sands through the hourglass, runs out. One more from PN, however.
Cable news shows that had people insinuating Palin, whom America had not yet even met, was a bad mother, and that used her daughter's circumstances to examine Republican views on abstinence education? That was ugly.
Ugly? WTF? Used the slutty daughter to illustrate the sheer idiocy of "abstinence education?" (Where's the "education" in that, BTW?) What better illustration than the chickens coming home to roost in Wasilla? Read the remainder of the piece, & you'll for whom it's "over." The bell tolls for thee, Peggy.

That About Which We Could Not Possibly Care Any Fucking Less

1. Burning Man. 2. Vampires. 3. The Fall 2008 Telebision Season. 4. Telebision in general. (That will shock the living hell out of many of our regular viewers, & may be an actual sign of the forthcoming apocalypse. As if Mme. Moosedropping isn't enough of a sign thereof.)

Friday, September 5, 2008

Today's History Lesson

Don't let this happen to you!!
One vital lesson to be gained from history is to be sure your weapons are cleaned, lubricated & functional. Case in point: On this date in 1975, Manson mamacita Lynette "Squeaky" Fromme tried to plug United Snakes President G. R. Ford in Sacramento, but her .45 jammed, or she didn't have a round chambered or something, who can remember? Make sure you know what the fug you're up to when you're out trying to change history, smash the state, or whatever. Also today, in 1793, the "Reign of Terror" began in France, as the National Convention instituted "harsh measures" to repress counter-revolutionary activities. See also: Republican Convention, 2008. Off w/ their heads!!

"I Married My Mother": The John Sidney McCain III Story

Dr. Freud, paging Dr. Freud. Below we see Lt. (j. g.) J. S. McCain III w/ his mommy, Roberta, & his superior officer, Adm. J. S. ("Jack") McCain, Jr., beneath a picture of Adm. J. S. McCain, Sr., at the dedication of McCain Field in 1961.Here we see a photo of J. S. McCain III getting hitched to his second, younger, wife, in 1980.Besides the obvious physical similarities, the Incredible Shrinking Newspaper™© notes:
McCain's father, Jack, was a deeply ambitious sailor. Nicknamed "Good Goddamn McCain," he was a binge alcoholic who tried fitfully toward the end of his life to control his drinking. "When he was drunk," wrote McCain, "I did not recognize him." Jack married a charming woman who would be indispensable to his rise in the Navy. Roberta Wright was one of two beautiful identical twins, rich young women whose father had retired at 40 after making a killing as an oil wildcatter. Jack and Roberta eloped to Tijuana and were married in a room above Caesar's, the restaurant where, some say, the famous salad originated.
If marrying an heiress was good enough for Daddy, why shouldn't it work for Trey? We have a vague sort of idea about George W. Bush's relationship (Oedipal) w/ his "Poppy." Do we need another fucked-up psychiatric basket case working his problems out on the world stage? Not to go out on a limb here, but perhaps not. Another exciting factoid from the Liberal Hymnal™©:
In fact, McCain lives by a series of honor codes, instilled in him by his father (an admiral) and his father's father (also an admiral). To boil them down to their simplest formulation: One must never lie, cheat or steal. McCain would be the first to admit that he has failed, sometimes spectacularly, at all three. But he also has perfected the familiar American ritual of coming clean and moving on.
Wouldn't it be nice if someone, somewhere were held accountable for something & publicly shamed, fired, etc., rather than being forgiven over & over, as the religio-hypocrites love doing? Let alone getting a "Medal of Freedom" for allowing attacks on New York & the Pentagon. (We mean you, George Tenet.) But back to McCain & his "moral code." We're pretty much doubled up laughing. "Don't lie, cheat or steal." Wow, that's a new one. Very strict too. Dropping bombs on civilians from the relative safety of a jet aircraft is no moral or ethical problem. And allowing the torture of others in your name is cool. Really, the only "moral code" (of course the filthy, non-ending hypocrisy of those who chant "morality, morals, blah blah blah" incessantly has taken all value from the word "moral") one needs is "Do unto others as, etc." as first espoused by Gautama Buddha some 500 yrs. before the best part of the sky-fairy Jeezis ran down Joseph's leg. Or, to put it in terms even AmeriKKKans can understand: "Don't be a fucking asshole, asshole." Even his buddies admit he's a weaselly fuckwad.
"He is the best apologizer in politics," said Dan Schnur, who was McCain's campaign spokesman in 2000 and now directs the Jesse M. Unruh Institute of Politics at USC.
One doesn't become "the best apologizer" w/o much for which to apologize. Let's be nice for thirty seconds, or at least note something interesting & possibly decent.
In his biography, "John McCain: An American Odyssey," Timberg wrote that McCain began cheating on Carol while serving in a training squadron in Florida. "Off duty, usually on routine cross-country flights to Yuma and El Paso, John started carousing and running around with women," he wrote. Carol McCain told Timberg, the only writer to have interviewed her extensively about the breakup, that McCain's imprisonment had nothing to do with their divorce: "I attribute it more to John turning 40 and wanting to be 25 again." But there is no question she was devastated. And their three children, Doug and Andy -- Carol's sons who McCain had adopted -- and Sidney, their daughter, were wounded as well. None attended their father's wedding. "I was certainly mad and disappointed at Dad," Andy McCain told the New York Times in 2000. "I hold him responsible. I don't hold Cindy responsible one bit." Andy, 46, is chief financial officer of Cindy McCain's beer distributorship.
Pretty amazing that Andy, not even J. Sidney's biological son, has a job w/ Cinderella's beer company. That would seem at first glance to be a nice thing, but who knows what or who is being paid off? You can imagine that Andy could have been quite a bit of trouble for his step-father's various political campaigns, like Giuliani's son. And surprise, he doesn't hold Cinderella, his employer, one bit responsible for the whole ugly mess. No cheating, remember? (Hey, we can't be nice for even thirty seconds. What do you know?) A last question, raised by the photos in the Times piece. If this is Sid meeting his wife (The first one, Carol, in case you're confused.) after getting off the plane (no dates more specific than 1973, thanks mucho, Times) at Travis AFB, say, directly from Hanoi or a stop-over in Hawaii, & he's moving under his own powerthen what's the dilly-o that he manages to be gimping it up on crutches (Remember the days of wooden ones?) when he meets The Nix, also in 1973? We get a very slight impression from the Senator that he thinks his interminable (for him, sure, but in the telling thereof over & over as well) imprisonment has entitled him to be President of these United Snakes. Guess again, Mr. "Moral Code."

Tomorrow Belongs to Me

Official Republican Platform, 2008 Election Cycle: 1. Nine/Eleven! 2. P. o. W.!! 3. Drill, Baby, Drill!!! 4. U-S-A! U-S-A! 5. Gawd's Will Be Done!!!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

If Bristol Were Black...

We mentioned the grotesque hypocrisy previously, but we're not the only ones thinking along those lines. We weren't as explicit in stating that if there were negritude involved, it would be a different story entirely.
Visit any news Web site and read the comments that flow from the mention of teen pregnancy. Won't take long before some self-professed, Republican-loving Christian defines the problem as one created by black folks.
No shit.

A Bit More History

Our Flag
Red, Green & Gold, in a Rasta Stylee

More of Today in History

It's the 100th birthday of Richard Wright, author of Black Boy & Native Son, two books that many middle-class Anglo youth read in high school during the '60s. Who knows if they're still taught today. (Or if anything at all is taught today? Our immediate guess is no, but we're cynical.)

At Last, No More "Partisan Rancor"

John S. McCain III, noted pleasant fellow & all around nice guy, has called for an end to “the constant partisan rancor that stops us from solving these problems.” We hope that the Senator lets his vice-presidential nominee in on this excellent-sounding concept very soon. And on that note we'll stop discussing the "hockey mom" from hell until her handlers allow her to have some sort of contact w/ the media, & she manages to put her foot in her mouth right up to her knee.

Happy B-Day to the Belly of the Beast

Today marks the 200th & something anniversary of the founding of The City of Our Lady of The Angels of Porciuncula, known to most of you as Los Angeles, California (or L. A.) known to us as the city in whose parks we sleep. L. A. was founded by a collection of losers who were run out of the Spanish mission to the east, San Gabriel, & walked west until they found running water. In the 200 odd yrs. since, more & more people have been attracted here, for reasons no longer determinable. Really, the weather isn't that great. Just stay the hell away.

Clothes Make The Whore (Remember, Marriage Is Prostitution)

Enough w/ Mme. Moosedroppings, let's take a peep at Cinderella Stepford Hensley McCain & Laura "Pickles" Bush. (Photo: Mary Knox Merrill/CSM)At the Greasy Old Pricks' convention, one of them looking a great deal like a rotting banana, not unlike Mme. Senator Clinton & her pumpkin pantsuit. We'll just betcha that Mrs. Clinton's ensemble didn't run quite as much as either of the two skanks above spent on their outfits. To wit (per Vanity Fair): Laura Bush Oscar de la Renta suit: $2,500 Stuart Weitzman heels: $325 Pearl stud earrings: $600–$1,500 Total: Between $3,425 and $4,325 Cindy McCain Oscar de la Renta dress: $3,000 Chanel J12 White Ceramic Watch: $4,500 Three-carat diamond earrings: $280,000 Four-strand pearl necklace: $11,000–$25,000 Shoes, designer unknown: $600 Total: Between $299,100 and $313,100 Stupid Question: Who's this Oscar de la Renta fuck who sells this overpriced junk to rich bitches?

Annals of Law Abiding

A law abiding citizen puts his guns to good use in Westwood (mere blocks from the park where Just Another Blog's™ editorial staff sleeps).
Man with van load of ammunition shoots traffic light in Westwood, UCLA police say Gene Bush allegedly began firing at a traffic light at Broxton and Le Conte avenues. Authorities say the 52-year-old, now in custody, had more than 10,000 rounds of ammo in his van and a storage locker, as well as timers and other suspicious materials in his briefcase. [...] Campus police said they did not believe that Bush had a criminal history. They said he appeared to be living in his van.
More guns for more law abiders, we say. Where are ours? We've never been convicted of anything.

No Coloreds or Dogs, Please

Below: No one under 35 either, we'd guess, & we're being pretty forgiving about that. Photo: Win Mcnamee/Getty Images
"They walk alike, they talk alike, at times they even dress alike..."
The Joint Center reported that the number of black Republican delegates declined from a record 167 in 2004 to this year's 36. According to the think tank, 24 state delegations at the Xcel Energy Center have no black members. The homogeneity of the audience is sometimes reinforced by delegations' tendency to dress alike. Floridians sported Hawaiian shirts decorated with palm trees Monday night, and more than 150 Texas delegates and alternates wore red shirts and straw cowboy hats Tuesday.
Excuse us, but couldn't the Floridians wear shirts from their own state? Something along the lines of a shirt reading: "My grandma lives in Boca Raton & all I got was this cheap T-shirt made by slave laborers in Honduras," maybe? Brain-dead authoritarians all the way. You've heard it before: "We're just more comfortable when everyone looks the same & dresses nicely. It's not racist or anything."

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

"It's Over"

We leave you today w/ a quick word or two from Peggy Noonan, WSJ columnist & generally delusional wackjob. Our friends at POLITICO have graciously transcribed a televised (though not, it appears, intentionally) conversation Ms. Noonan held recently w/ two other mopes, & provided a link to video thereof. We're almost missing telbision.
The following is an excerpt from a convo between Mike Murphy and Peggy Noonan and Chuck Todd thanks be to a live mike, as reported by Josh Marshall of Talking Points Memo (here's a video): Chuck Todd: Mike Murphy, lots of free advice, we'll see if Steve Schmidt and the boys were watching. We'll find out on your BlackBerry. Tonight voters will get their chance to hear from Sarah Palin, and she will get the chance to show voters she's the right woman for the job. Up next, one man who's already convinced, and he'll us why Gov. Jon Huntsman. (cut away) Peggy Noonan: Yeah. Mike Murphy: You know, because I come out of the blue swing state governor world: Engler, Whitman, Tommy Thompson, Mitt Romney, Jeb Bush. I mean, these guys — this is how you win a Texas race, just run it up. And it's not gonna work. And — PN: It's over. MM: Still McCain can give a version of the Lieberman speech to do himself some good. CT: I also think the Palin pick is insulting to Kay Bailey Hutchinson, too. PN: Saw Kay this morning. CT: Yeah, she's never looked comfortable about this — MM: They're all bummed out. CT: Yeah, I mean is she really the most qualified woman they could have turned to? PN: The most qualified? No! I think they went for this — excuse me — political bullshit about narratives — CT: Yeah they went to a narrative. MM: I totally agree. PN: Every time the Republicans do that, because that's not where they live and it's not what they're good at, they blow it. MM: You know what's really the worst thing about it? The greatness of McCain is no cynicism, and this is cynical. CT: This is cynical, and as you called it, gimmicky. MM: Yeah.

More on Miss Wasilla's Spiritual Influences

Does Gov. Palin strike you as the type to think for herself, or to question any authority? Us neither, so if this is the kind of crap being pumped into her piled-up 'do head, well, can't wait until the Princess has her finger on the apocalyptic button.
From a July 28, 2007 sermon: “Do you believe we’re in the last days? After listening to Newt Gingrich and the prime minister of Israel and a number of others at our gathering, I became convinced, and I have been convinced for some time. We are living in the last days. These are incredible times to live in.”
We can only these are the "last days" for Newt Gingrich.
From an November 25, 2007 sermon: “The purpose for the United States is… to glorify God. This nation is a Christian nation.”

United Secret Assholes Like Sarah Palin

If the Council on Foreign Relations is some sort of left-wing/commie conspiracy desiring to enslave us all under a one-world gov't., the Council for National Policy is a Christo-fascist conspiracy to enslave us all under a one-world gov't. while awaiting the rapture & apocalypse. Max Blumenthal advises us further.
CNP members have included Tony Perkins, James Dobson, Grover Norquist, Tim LaHaye and Paul Weyrich. At a secret 2000 meeting of the CNP, George W. Bush promised to nominate only pro-life judges; in 2004, then-Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist told the group, "The destiny of the nation is on the shoulders of the conservative movement." This year, thanks to Sarah Palin's selection, the movement may have finally aligned itself behind the campaign of John McCain. Though Dobson and Perkins reportedly attended the recent CNP meeting in Minneapolis, a full roster of guests would be nearly impossible to acquire. The CNP deliberately operates below the radar, going to excessive lengths to obscure its activities. According to official CNP policy,"The media should not know when or where we meet or who takes part in our programs before or after a meeting." Thus the CNP's Minneapolis gathering was free of reporters. I learned of the get-together only through an online commentary by one of its attendees, top Dobson/Focus on the Family flack Tom Minnery. (Watch it here).

Just Make Her Go Away

We were getting sick & tired of smearingbringing the facts about Caribou Barbie to the unwashed masses, & started picking on the traitorous Senator from Connecticut, Joseph Lieberman. But there's just no avoiding the one-time Miss Wasilla. From Politico comes the religious usefulness of the Palin selection.
A prominent Obama backer, Florida Rep. Robert Wexler, has attacked Palin for appearing at a 1999 event with Pat Buchanan — who has attacked the influence of the Israeli lobby in America. [...] “There is almost always an inverse proportion between a candidate's popularity among conservative Christians and secular Jews,” said Jeff Ballabon, a Republican lobbyist long active in Jewish politics who supports McCain. An illustration of that gap came just two weeks ago, when Palin’s church, the Wasilla Bible Church, gave its pulpit over to a figure viewed with deep hostility by many Jewish organizations: David Brickner, the executive director of Jews for Jesus. Palin’s pastor, Larry Kroon, introduced Brickner on Aug. 17, according to a transcript of the sermon on the church’s website. “He’s a leader of Jews for Jesus, a ministry that is out on the leading edge in a pressing, demanding area of witnessing and evangelism,” Kroon said. Brickner then explained that Jesus and his disciples were themselves Jewish. “The Jewish community, in particular, has a difficult time understanding this reality,” he said. Brickner’s mission has drawn wide criticism from the organized Jewish community, and the Anti-Defamation League accused them in a report of “targeting Jews for conversion with subterfuge and deception.” Brickner also described terrorist attacks on Israelis as God's "judgment of unbelief" of Jews who haven't embraced Christianity. "Judgment is very real and we see it played out on the pages of the newspapers and on the television. It's very real. When [Brickner's son] was in Jerusalem he was there to witness some of that judgment, some of that conflict, when a Palestinian from East Jerusalem took a bulldozer and went plowing through a score of cars, killing numbers of people. Judgment — you can't miss it." Palin was in church that day, Kroon said, though he cautioned against attributing Brickner’s views to her. The executive director of the National Jewish Democratic Council, Ira Forman, cited the “cultural distance” between Palin and almost all American Jews. “She’s totally out of step with the American Jewish community,” he said. “She is against reproductive freedom – even against abortion in the case of rape and incest. She has said that climate change is not man-made. She has said that she would favor teaching creationism in the schools. These are all way, way, way outside the mainstream.” [...] Also Tuesday, a new Jewish Democratic group,, sent out an email under the heading “Who is Sarah Palin?” an echo of conspiratorial anti-Obama emails that have criss-crossed the Jewish community. “Given her record as a hard-right Christian conservative, her embrace of Pat Buchanan, her praise of Ron Paul, and her lack of credentials on foreign affairs, it is likely that her selection would raise serious red flags about the McCain/Palin ticket among Jewish swing voters,” they wrote, asking their members to send out their own anti-Palin emails.
A bit more along these lines from HuffPo, w/ video. At this point we're not sure if we want an Eagleton moment, or if we think that John McCain should go w/ his "gut" & keep Mme. Palin. We suppose that if he drops her like a bad habit, he could choose someone even worse. But what would all the Hillary fans say after an unceremonious dumping?

Humuncular Treason

Shouldn't the Independent Senator from Connecticut, Joseph Lieberman, who continued to call himself a "Democrat" last night, during his speech before the Republican convention, be tried for treason? Seriously. His rabid, fanatical defense of the Nation of Israel (not the 51st state, despite what some would have you believe) which has lead him to such excesses as backing the Iraq war & occupation, and calling for attacks on Iran, would certainly indicate that he places the welfare io Israel ahead of that of these United Snakes. Indeed, looks as if Sen. Joe took Gov. Sarah to meet the AIPAC Lobby yesterday.
MSNBC and the Jewish Telegraphic Agency (JTA) are reporting that Gov. Palin met this afternoon with the board of directors of the America Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC) and Sen. Joe Lieberman to, in the words of one McCain campaign official cited by MSNBC, put “the American Jewish community at ease over her understanding of US-Middle East relations.” It’s worth noting that Palin, who has obviously been completely off-limits to reporters since she was rolled out as McCain’s running-mate in Dayton Friday, stiffed a reception in her honor sponsored by none other than Phyllis Schlafly a couple hours later. (One wonders what other lobbies have tried to arrange a meeting with Palin in the last 96 hours and with what success.) “We had a good productive discussion on the importance of the U.S.-Israel relationship, and we were pleased that Gov. Palin expressed her deep, personal, and lifelong commitment to the safety and well-being of Israel,” AIPAC spokesman Josh Block said after the meeting. “Like Sen. McCain, the vice presidential nominee understands and believes in the special friendship between the two democracies and would work to expand and deepen the strategic partnership in a McCain/Palin Administration.” “She was extremely well received,” McCain campaign spokesman Michael Goldfarb said, noting that Palin was interrupted by applause twice,” according to the JTA account. He added that Palin spoke about “the relationship between Israel and American national security, and the threats to Israel from Iran and others.” Evidence of nervousness in the McCain campaign about Palin’s impact on Jewish voters and donors was made clear when the Likudist Republican Jewish Coalition circulated a video of her Alaska office in which it found a small Israeli flag, in the words of Politico, “poking out from behind a drape.” “I think it speaks volumes that she keeps an Israeli flag on the wall of her office,” RJC’s executive director, Matt Brooks, told Politico in an e-mail. “It clearly shows what’s in her heart.” Politico’s analysis is well worth reading. As I noted Friday, a Nexis search of the two years previous to her selection as McCain’s running-mate failed to find a single published article in which Palin ever mentioned Israel. I suspect it may make it into her acceptance speech Wednesday night.
Here's Sen. Lieberman in his own words speaking to AIPAC in March 2007.

In the great policy discussions in Washington, I've learned, there are opponents on the one side, and on the other, there are allies, and friends, and then, there is family. For me and many others, AIPAC is family—united in our shared history, our shared values, and our shared vision for the future. As family, we can talk frankly with each other, and that is what I would like to do with you today.

The fact is we can't afford anything less than honesty at a time like this—a time when, as citizens of America and supporters of Israel, we confront grave and growing dangers to the nations we care so much about. The threats I am referring to are directed not just against the security of our societies, but against the values that define who we are and who we hope to be. They are threats to the universal principles of freedom, of democracy, of the rule of law—threats to the fundamental human rights that we believe are not just cherished by, but endowed to everyone on earth. I do not need to tell you about the nature of these threats. I do not need to tell you about the regime in Iran—about its determination to acquire nuclear weapons, about its sponsorship of terrorism, about its repression of its own citizens. I do not need to tell you about Al Qaeda and Hezbollah and Hamas—about their addiction to violence, about their pathological hatred of America and Israel, about their ambitions for conquest. And I do not need to tell you about the fanatical ideology that links these different groups—the ideology of Islamist extremism, a totalitarian ideology as violent and vicious as the fascism and communism we Americans and our allies fought and defeated in the last century.

A man who wishes to serve two nations, & two parties. We think there's something clever in Shakespeare about this, but it slips our tired, aging mind. We're sure it was in a tragedy, & the two-faced protagonist didn't end well.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Palin Poop Plus

From TIME, concerning the Governor's mayoral stint:
Stein says that as mayor, Palin continued to inject religious beliefs into her policy at times. "She asked the library how she could go about banning books," he says, because some voters thought they had inappropriate language in them. "The librarian was aghast." That woman, Mary Ellen Baker, couldn't be reached for comment, but news reports from the time show that Palin had threatened to fire Baker for not giving "full support" to the mayor. St. George, however, points out that Palin couldn't have seen everything through an Evangelical lens. She did, he says, notably resist calls to restrict operating hours for the bars in town. And even if faith did play an unusually large role in her decision-making as mayor, it may have only reflected the continued rise of Evangelicalism in the valley, a growth that continues to this day. "We like to call this the Bible Belt of Alaska," says Cheryl Metiva, head of the local chamber of commerce. Churches proliferate in Wasilla today, and among the largest and most influential is the Wasilla Bible Church, where the Palins worship. At the 11:15 a.m. Sunday service, hundreds sit in folding chairs, listening to a 20-minute sermon about the Book of Malachi and singing along to alt-rock praise songs. The only sign of culture warring in the whole production is an insert in the day's program advertising an upcoming Focus on the Family conference on homosexuality in Anchorage called Love Won Out. The group promises to teach attendees how to "respond to misinformation in our culture" and help them "overcome" homosexuality.
Kill a queer for Jeezis. And, more on Alaska secessionism & Sarah. (If they're going to give us people like Gov. Palin, Sen. Stevens & Rep. Young, it's OK by Just Another Blog™ for them to fuck off. And take most of the South w/ you, crackers.)

Right Wing, Half Wrong

David Brooks, in his inimitable, even a stopped clock is correct once or twice a day style, has an op-ed in the NYT today telling us why Sarah Palin is not a good choice for John McCain, not dwelling on her personal baggage, but on her unfortunate similarities to the Senator from Budweiser.
My worry about Palin is that she shares McCain’s primary weakness — that she has a tendency to substitute a moral philosophy for a political philosophy. [...] Rob Portman or Bob Gates wouldn’t have been politically exciting, but they are capable of performing those tasks. Palin, for all her gifts, is not. She underlines McCain’s strength without compensating for his weaknesses. The real second fiddle job is still unfilled.
All well & good, but Mr. Brooks nonetheless comes up w/ a few howlers, to put it mildly.
The main axis in McCain’s worldview is not left-right. It’s public service versus narrow self-interest.
It should be obvious to anyone granted an NYT column that the very difference between left & right is that of public service versus narrow self-interest. Has the Bush Administration taught Mr. Brooks nothing besides the already tired "Mr. Bush isn't a real conservative" talking point? According to Mr. Brooks, Sen. McCain has
been drawn to those crusades that enabled him to launch frontal attacks on the concentrated powers of selfishness — whether it was the big money donors who exploited the loose campaign finance system, the earmark specialists in Congress like Alaska’s Don Young and Ted Stevens, the corrupt Pentagon contractors or Jack Abramoff
& his selection of Gov. Palin
allows McCain to run the way he wants to — not as the old goat running against the fresh upstart, but as the crusader for virtue against the forces of selfishness. It allows him to make cleaning out the Augean stables of Washington the major issue of his campaign.
Not a good move to run on the old "clean up Washington" ticket, not only because there are a few more problems in our nation & our world than "Washington," but because Sen. McCain's campaign against "big money donors" was an attempt to distance himself from his having been a member of the Keating Five. While Alaska's representatives may have been "earmark" champions (Why did "earmark" replace "pork barrel spending," anyway?) when much of your state is Federal land, you just don't have the tax base to provide infrastructure that other states can pay for on their own. Not that this excuses any actual criminal activity Messrs. Young & Stevens may have been involved in. Pentagon contracting bullshit? Still going on. Sen. McCain's own service, the Navy, doesn't even know what it wants. Jack Abramoff? Just say Google™. If only Mr. Brooks were capable of doing a bit of research. This one we just don't get.
But most Americans will understand that this is what happens in real life, that parents and congregations nurture young parents through this sort of thing every day.
Which "congregation" is that, the one w/ the Scarlet Letters, perhaps? And we're talking here about under-18 unwed parents, not merely "young parents." St. Nick on a Stick, it's the very end of the universe when most people, especially those of a duskier hue, if you know what we mean, have children out of wedlock, but when middle-class Anglos do it it's all "Oh, happens every day, no one's perfect, keep out of their private lives," ad nauseum. Mr. Brooks sees corruption everywhere.
There are some issues where the most important job is to rally the armies of decency against the armies of corruption: Confronting Putin, tackling earmarks and reforming the process of government.
Certainly "confronting Putin" is a job for the Clean Gov't. Association., or maybe the League of Women Voters. 'Cause "corruption" is the only problem we have w/ Russia. But this becomes boring & pointless. The "Augean stables of Washington" will not & cannot be cleaned out until campaigns are publicly funded, & lobbyists giving money & the pols accepting it can be sent to the cooler for illegal bribery, as opposed to today's legal version. Mr. Brooks neglects to mention this. He's still right about why Mme. Gov. is a bad move, though. And we can only hope that Sen. McCain runs on the clean up Washington platform, while the American people are being forced to choose between eating or filling the gas tank so they can get at least some of their furniture out of the foreclosed house. Or greet their children's coffins as they return from the war zones. Remember: Reform, Prosperity, Peace.

GOP Photo Gallery

Behind the candidates: Todd, Piper, Willow, & Bristol (holding Trig) Palin, Cindy & Meghan McCain, Friday 29 August 2008 in Ohio. Note Mme. McCain's affectless face & orange gams. By the way, what the hell happened to ladies hosiery? You dames finally give up on the torture of pantyhose? Photo: Jim Wilson/The NYT. Click to enlarge.
And from the convention, The Undead & Pickles. Photo: Brendan Smialowski for The New York Times

All in the Family Way

We had a sneaking suspicion when we heard that Sarah (then Heath) & her high school sweetheart Todd Palin had "eloped" in 1988, & that their son "Track" is now 19. Now we read that "Track" (it's in quotation marks because we still can't believe anyone would name their child "Track") was born a mere eight months after his parents "eloped." Like mother, like daughter. Per MoDo of the NYT,
Track (named after high school track meets), Bristol (after Bristol Bay where they did commercial fishing), Willow (after a community in Alaska), Piper (just a cool name) and Trig (Norse for “strength.”)
Norse for "strength." Are we dealing w/ a touch of white supremacy here? Norse? Huh? And what's next? Children named after swim meets? ("Breaststroke?") Or someplace their parents liked? Would you name your child "Grand Canyon" if you'd worked there? Or "Skokie?" The possibilities are endless. We'll also note that the right wing religious droolers/hypocrites, having already backed a divorced guy (R. Reagan) & guys who divorced their wives to marry the woman w/ whom they'd been catting around (McCain, Gingrich) & a host of others caught w/ their pants around their ankles (not only Sen. Craig) are now solidly behind a tramp who got knocked up w/o benefit of clergy, setting a fine example for her daughter, who, naturally, followed in her footsteps. Perhaps the traditional "shotgun wedding" is considered the best way to preserve the "institution of marriage," now that the Sodomites are somehow threatening it. And perhaps Gov. Palin should have been known as "Slutty Sarah Barracuda."

GOP Veep Nom Kills Bullwinkle™©

A '60s publicity shot of the murdered Bullwinkle™©.
Below: Circumstantial evidence. Gov. Palin & an unidentified daughter pose w/ a just murdered caribou, in an undated AP photo.
Below, Bullwinkle™© & his long-time partner, Rocket J. Squirrel™©, in happier times.
Millions of "Baby Boomers" are mourning the death of Bullwinkle The Moose™©, shot dead in cold (Very cold, it's Alaska!!) blood by presumptive Republican Vice-Presidential nominee Sarah Palin, who apparently got a craving for her favorite food ([Palin] "said her favorite meal at home is moose burgers and caribou sausages") went out, & plugged the cartoon icon as he was foraging through garbage cans near Gov. Palin's pad. The moose had apparently fallen on hard times recently, as his early 1960s contract w/ Jay Ward Productions did not provide for residual payments, & the heartless bastards at the Walt Disney Company, who had acquired the rights to the moose's image & television programs, had told him to "fuck off & die" when he requested consideration for the use of his image & voice. Bullwinkle's long-time companion-partner, Rocket J. Squirrel™©, was reported to be under psychiatric evaluation & sedation at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn., near the squirrel's home, Frostbite Falls, after making alternating threats to commit suicide or go after the Alaska Governess w/ a hunting rifle of his own. The squirrel had made better investments than his moose companion, which was a major factor in their break-up following the release of a re-union movie in 2000, The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Annals of Executive Ability

Below: Sarah, NapoleonTodd, & Bristol Palin, pledging something.
Well, well, well. Well. File this one under schadenfreude of the first water. GOP presumptive veep nominee Sarah Palin apparently can't keep her own evangelical Xian, theocratic, snow-mobilin', moose-murderin' family under control. Nope, looks as if unmarried first daughter Bristol, of the possibly Second Family, has gotten herself preggers. That's what happens when you select white trash to be your running mate, eh John McCain? Or when you select rabid drooling anti-abortion & doubtless anti-contraception ninnies to accompany you on your Straight-Talk Express to nowhere. Their mutant issue get themselves knocked up. Extra-funny part:
Sarah Palin said Monday that her 17-year-old unmarried daughter is five months pregnant, an announcement campaign aides said was aimed at rebutting Internet rumors that Palin's youngest son, born in April, was actually her daughter's.

This goes beyond satire, lampooning, parody or anything else. Seriously, read it again. Understand fully: In order to dispel rumors that Trig was actually Bristol's child, they had to reveal that Bristol is currently five mos. pregnant. Remember Billy Carter, or Roger Clinton, the last time that rednecks were let into the White House? (Not to mention, of course, such criminal degenerates as the Bush Bros., or that daughter of Jeb's who's always in re-hab.) Hokey Smokes, if we ever get around to re-registering to vote (By the way, are the address-deficient denied their voting rights?) we might just have to go for Sen. McCain & Governor Palin. Talk about your Alaska Gold Rush. This would be the Alaska Comedy Gold Rush.

The usual RW hypocrisy is spread on thickly. As long as Bristol's getting a start on her quiverful, it's OK. Really, women are for use as breeders & for child-rearin', nothin' wrong w/ a good Christian girl gittin' a head start. Like at that nice Warren Jeffs' little preserve out there in Texas. He's got the right idea.

Focus on the Family founder James Dobson issued a statement commending the Palins for "for not just talking about their pro-life and pro-family values, but living them out even in the midst of trying circumstances." He added: "Being a Christian does not mean you're perfect. Nor does it mean your children are perfect. But it does mean there is forgiveness and restoration when we confess our imperfections to the Lord."
So, all sinning is OK, as long as we confess afterwards? To hell w/ the laws then. Let each do as he will, & pay in the afterlife. Are we getting this right, Dobson? How's that showering w/ young boys so they know who's boss thing going, Jimmy? Nothing to confess to your feudal "lord" there, right?

Death to The Bosses!!!

It's Labor Day. But here in AmeriKKKa, we're special. We don't celebrate on the first of May, as the rest of the world does. No, we made up our own day, to bring summer to a crashing end. Nonetheless, the editorial staff is taking the day off. Because the fucking public libraries are closed, & we can't afford a laptop. So there! Get the hell away from that computer & go watch telebision for a while. Or burn yourselves to death in a barbecuing accident. (Meat is murder.) Just don't expect anything from us.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Lazy as Sin

It's a three day wknd., y'all are lucky you got anything out of us yesterday. Now go jump in a lake, or some other recreational-type activity. (Jump off a cliff, for example. Or fall under your PWC & get chopped to bits by some drunk's propeller.)