Saturday, March 8, 2008

More of the Same

Other than the funny pictures (Ha ha, we're all laughing, aren't we?) below, we still have nothing, except a hideous sinus infection that makes us think our left eyeball is about to implode, or perhaps pop out of its socket. Indeed, if we hadn't wanted to find the nearest chain drugstore in our new home city, we might not even have hit the library today...

Dancing Primate

The Chimp-in-Chief. Especially the shot on the left. AP photos by Charles Dharapak, taken while the ape-man waited for his new butt-boy McCain on 5 March 2008.

Friday, March 7, 2008

Emptiness

We've nothing today. It all seems especially idiotic & more pointless than ever. Perhaps it's because self-appointed (by ourself) bête noire Megan McArdle is or will soon be here in Santa Monica ("Official Home of the Homeless," per Harry Shearer) for a "conference." Now, besides the police & everything else, we have to watch out for people w/ the appearance of overgrown elves. Will the agony (& suffering) ever end?

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Annals of Homelessness

What your editor sleeps under, or sometimes on, when occupying his G. I. cot in an armory:
DISASTER BLANKET
30 % WOOL 70% MAN MADE FIBERS
UNICOR - FEDERAL PRISON INDUSTRIES, INC.
SPM1C0-07-FCF03
7210-00-119-5335

THIS BLANKET CONTAINS NO DDT
DO NOT DRY CLEAN OR LAUNDER
We kid you not. Nor did we even know there was an issue of DDT in blankets. What does bother us are the gold & silver metallic fibers(?) like tinsel, spread throughout the blanket.

P. S.: We have already copywritten the phrase "Disaster Blanket" for our next emo band, so you needn't bother.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

How'd We Miss This?

Also in yesterday's L. A. Times, at the bottom of the page, like the "Jonah Goldberg has the day off" statement referred to a few items below, but on the other side of the page:
For the record Flag: Jonah Goldberg's Feb. 26 column said a Che Guevara-emblazoned Cuban flag was hanging in the Houston headquarters of Barack Obama's campaign. The flag had been in the office of some Obama volunteers, not campaign headquarters.
Well, that'll give you a good idea of the "carefully detailed research" (paraphrased) that Loadpants claimed for his Liberal Fascism.

Meet The New Boss, Etc.

It's official. Sidney is the Republican nominee for president. Looks as if Bush endorsed him. From the White House itself:
He's a President, and he's going to be the President who will bring determination to defeat an enemy, and a heart big enough to love those who hurt.
Except that we heard W(orst) on the radio, & he said "He's gohn be the President..." The White House website is lying to you, America. Sidney's not a President, either. Other thoughts on John Sidney McSame (as Bush): He didn't really "serve" his country. He wasted his Naval Academy education & flight training for five yrs. in the Hanoi Hilton, not to mention the aircraft he lost. We'll more than grant that he suffered for his country (or was punished for his war crimes of bombing civilians) but there was little service involved. We're not going to look it up, but we heard a caller on RW Rant Radio, when RWRR was busily hating on McCain when he suddenly popped up again, state that McCain was a lousy pilot who'd lost at least two other aircraft in training missions, & the caller, as an alleged aviator himself, said he wouldn't trust McCain's judgement. But the Rant Radio attitude has changed a bit since then. We might also add that McCain's only actual executive experience was as the CO of the largest naval aviation squadron (We've heard him say that himself.) whatever that means. And then he was the U. S. Navy's liaison to the U. S. Senate. Another l-word for liaison: Lobbyist. As in the lobbyists who apparently run McCain's campaign. From VA Watchdog.org, here's Sidney's record on veteran's issues:

2006 Senator McCain supported the interests of the Disabled American Veterans 20 percent in 2006. 2006 In 2006 Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America gave Senator McCain a grade of D. 2006 Senator McCain sponsored or co-sponsored 18 percent of the legislation favored by the The Retired Enlisted Association in 2006. 2005 Senator McCain supported the interests of the Disabled American Veterans 25 percent in 2005. 2004 Senator McCain supported the interests of the Disabled American Veterans 50 percent in 2004. 2004 Senator McCain supported the interests of the The Retired Enlisted Association 0 percent in 2004. 2003-2004 Senator McCain supported the interests of the Vietnam Veterans of America 100 percent in 2003-2004. 2003 Senator McCain supported the interests of the The American Legion 50 percent in 2003. 2001 Senator McCain supported the interests of the Vietnam Veterans of America 46 percent in 2001. 1999 Senator McCain supported the interests of the Disabled American Veterans 66 percent in 1999. 1997-1998 Senator McCain supported the interests of the Vietnam Veterans of America 0 percent in 1997-1998. 1989-1990 On the votes that the Vietnam Veterans of America considered to be the most important in 1989-1990 , Senator McCain voted their preferred position 50 percent of the time. Date Bill Title Vote 10/01/2007 National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2008 NV 02/02/2006 Tax Rate Extension Amendment N 11/17/2005 Additional Funding For Veterans Amendment N 10/05/2005 Health Care for Veterans Amendment N

A stellar record. That must be what Bush meant by "...a heart big enough to love those who hurt." (More proof of our contention that W(orst) is a closet case, which explains his substance abuse problem. Have your ever heard anything gayer? Not that there's anything wrong w/ that.) Sidney was smart enough to marry money though.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Annals of Egotism

Our lust for self-gratification has been thwarted recently by the time limitations of desk-top publishing from libraries. We haven't been perusing the Sitemeter obsessively to see whence our readers/viewers/visitors come. Yesterday, however, we did a bit of looking which led to Technorati.com & this very nice mention from Scott of World o' Crap, one of the supreme snarkmeisters in the world of Internet tubery. Also, World o' Crap are local yokels, earning them a prized place on the Locals Only bogroll [sic] to your right. Return the favor, investigate them!

Technical Notes

Today we publish from the Santa Monica Central Library, which only offers 90 min. of use per day, rather than the 120 min. from the L. A. Public Library. Better devil-boxes, though. And not quite as limited as the L. A. devil-boxes. Still won't let us save images to the hard drive. May have to shoplift a USB device, in order to provide the full visual spectrum we once did. Very nice library too, open, airy, all that crap. And they were kind enough to hand over a library card on the basis of an expired Calif. I. D. card...Suckers!!

Why Do You Think They Call Them Dopes?

A surprising item from the news services of Mighty Sorry, No Body Cares: Popular religious figure Moses may have been as high as a mother-fucking kite when he saw the burning bush & heard the blaring of a trumpet. Not to mention flames inscribing ten commandments onto a rock. The author of the study may not be that trustworthy, or he may know exactly what he's talking about:
Shanon wrote that he was very familiar with the affects of the ayahuasca plant, having “partaken of the ... brew about 160 times in various locales and contexts.”

Another Day, Another Dollar

Today is the second Tues. in three or four wks. that, per the L. A. Times, "Jonah Goldberg has the day off." We don't get this. He only types his column once a wk. Shouldn't The Times announce, "Jonah Goldberg has the week off?" Is he too busy on a book-pimping tour? (Whose title dare not speak its name.) Can't he send his column from whichever Barnes & Noble he's in? We're sure they have Wi-Fi. Maybe the psychic toll of being laughed at in the Q&As is too much. We sort of miss the opportunity to pick some low-hanging fruit. Yes, Pantload, you've just been called a fruit. But it's just as well, really. Requires more discipline from us.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Annals of "Religion"

Here's a surprise! The Dianetics/Scientology scam that talentless hack sci-fi typist L. Ron Hitler invented as a result of a $50.00 bet w/ some of the guys in his sci-fi authors club was plagiarized, much like that other "most American" of "religions," The Scam of Jesus Hussein Christ of Latter Day Saints. Mormon/American values: Strictly enforced tithing (if you don't tithe, you can't get into the secret temple & have an official Mormon marriage, etc.) Telling the faithful they're in the "last days " & should have two yrs. of canned goods & other supplies in their pantries, then selling the faithful said goodies through the church. Scientology/American values: Charging an arm & a leg for the "sacrament" (E-metering) which conveniently also reveals hidden secrets of the person seeking to be "clear" (or an "Operating Thetan") allowing the "Church" to exercise even more control over the marks. At least the Catholics don't actually charge for Confession & Communion. The Popes got their money the old-fashioned way, they stole as much gold & art as they could, or in the U. S. use the tax dodge to keep all the profits on their real estate holdings & the like.. Brought to our attention by boingboing.

What's in a Name? Shit by any Other Name Would yet Stink as Shit

Until the end (When, oh when?) of the current election season/cycle, we've decided that the "M." in M. Bouffant stands for Muhammad, or Mohamed, or Mahomet, or however one spells it. And should we have to refer to the legendary (or mythical) first-century Hebrew troublemaker & (per George W[orst] Bush) "political philosopher" Jesus H. Christ, the "H." will stand for Hussein.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

If Not a Tragedy, Certainly a Crying Shame

From a review of "The Bush Tragedy" in the NYT:
The Bush whom Weisberg skillfully and largely convincingly portrays is a man who has rarely reflected, who has almost never looked back, and who has constructed a self-image of strength, courage and boldness that has little basis in the reality of his life. He is driven less by bold vision than by a desire to get elected (and settle scores), less by real strength than by unfocused ambition, and less by courage than by an almost passive acquiescence in disastrous plans that the people he empowered pursued in his name.
Just Another Blog™ is hoping that, in the interest of those great conservative shibboleths personal responsibility & accountability, Mr. Bush, Mr. Cheney, Mr. Rove & all the other scum who have served them will be brought up on an infinity of criminal charges here in the United Snakes, & will then, after a fair trial & inevitable conviction, be handed over to the very International Criminal Court whose jurisdiction over American war criminals they have attempted to prevent for so long.